Life of a Veterinary Student

4 Years in Reflection

2011-05-06T20:00:00.006-04:00

Clearly, I like lists I am a type A vet student. As the week of graduation quickly approaches, I wanted to reflect on the top 10 things that have happened to me over the past 4 years.

Traveled to China, Jackson Hole, Wyoming, Scotland and England, and Spokane, Washington.
Attended many veterinary conferences: North American Veterinary Conference, Merck Summer Scholars Conference at Michigan State, VBMA National Meeting, SAVMA Symposium at Ohio State, VVMA conference in Roanoke, VA.
Rescued my dog on a Humane Society RAVS trip.
Learned how to handle wild raptors, songbirds, and mammals.
Lived alone.
Lived in Blacksburg, VA, a special place indeed.
Became a crossfit junkie.
Discovered rock climbing and kayaking.
Created and developed lifelong friendships.
Became a Doctor of Veterinary Medicine.

There are countless other moments that occurred over the past 4 years that have changed my life and shaped who I am. I have become stronger and wiser, while remaining humble and ignorant of many things left to learn. I left a lifeless career to enter a bright, challenging career with the bills to prove it.

Thanks vet school. Thanks to all my friends for their endless support. Thanks to my amazing 3 cats and wonderful dog. Thanks to all my teachers. Thanks to myself for persevering and finding the strength to get through the 4 years. Lastly and most importantly, thanks to my husband. He never wavered when I wanted to quit and drive 500+ miles a week to support me. I cannot wait to support you on your journey of higher education.

This blog entry marks the end of life of a veterinary student. I hope to create a new blog entitled "Life of a Veterinary Intern." Thank you followers for making me a part of your journeys. You can always email me with questions or for inspiration. 7+ years in the making and I can tell you, anythign is possible if you are passionate and work hard enough.

Wildlife Center of VA

2011-05-06T19:59:00.003-04:00

This rotation presented challenges and amazing learning opportunities, much like my last few blocks of vet school. I realized how much I have committed to memory about small animals and how little I know about birds, other mammals and wildlife management. After 3 weeks, however, I can collect blood from turtles, vultures, foxes, owls, raptors and songbirds. Today I collected blood from a painted turtle (super hard because you can’t see a vein) and a Turkey vulture both on the first attempt. I am now familiar with radiographs of these species as well. I learned how to identify baby birds, how to bandage broken wings, and when to try and when to euthanize wildlife based on injury. I absolutely loved the cultivated learning environment. Every single case was made into a learning experience by the staff in a hands-on fashion. Kudos to an excellent wildlife teaching hospital.

The first 10 days were extremely challenging, but I persevered and the reward has been invaluable. I am equipped to answer wildlife and exotics questions from my clients. I am no longer afraid of handling birds; in fact I love birds. This block in many ways was similar to my equine block. I went in fearful and apprehensive and left loving it. However, wildlife medicine has its downsides. Many animals cannot be released and are euthanized and many days it feels like you kill more than treat. On the upside to that, for many animals you stop their suffering and there is no client or financial decisions to interfere with the medicine.

The past 3 weeks have again confirmed that I love emergency and critical care; it's where my passion lies. I watched a blockmate who truly is passionate about wildlife and realized that is exactly how I feel about emergency. I am so thankful I had the chance to explore different areas of vet med over the past 4 years: Research, government work, lab animal medicine, wildlife medicine, organized veterinary medicine and many others. It is ironic that all of my exploration led me back to emergency medicine. We'll see how much I still love it after the next year of hard hours. I am ready...bring it on!

Block 16 into Block 17

2011-04-14T20:38:00.003-04:00

Spring fever has arrived and graduation fever arrived with it. My locker is cleaned out. My coveralls, surgical gowns, extra scrubs, old stethoscope sold to other students. Received my internship schedule today for the next 12+ months. Only 1 more rotation left between Class of 2011 and graduation day. That day we thought was impossible, that now is going to happen. I have been reflecting on how much I have grown through this process and how excited about my new career I am.

My last rotation at the teaching hospital has been more fun than I ever expected. My week on equine field services included going to Mill Mountain Zoo to help work on a 15 year old snow leopard with chronic vomiting. I jumped in and drew blood, ultrasounded his abdomen and learned once again that a regular vet can do zoo work on the side. The vet was humble, nice and applied his small animal knowledge to the leopard. I felt comfortable ultrasounding him and with his work up and thought to myself, "I could do this." It was a great trip and I learned they make portable endoscopes...so fun.

I have truly enjoyed working with horses. WHile I still don't know the lingo or how to lunge a horse, I do know a nice horse when I meet one and totally understand why they are deemed amazing creatures. I hope to have some trail/pleasure horses one day and definitely want to learn how to basic ride.

Meanwhile, I can count my days left in the Burg on 1 hand, but they are fun days. Saturday is 3.2 mile for 32 run in remembrance, a run I have done every year while I was here. Saturday is also Spokane's last agility lesson. Then it is off to Northern VA for a day to unpack the house and transport the cats for the final time. When I return to Blacksburg it will be graduation week, time to celebrate, canoe and camp with friends and get ready for a new chapter.

37 Days

2011-04-07T20:56:00.003-04:00

I am currently on the last senior rotation I will have at the veterinary teaching hospital at VT and I cannot believe it. In some ways I feel ready, in some ways I don't want to leave. It has been one busy block on large animal services, but I absolutely love horses. They are amazing, and I am no longer afraid. I have been blessed with some really great patients to work with, including a baby camel and her mom, who was thankfully nice as far as camel mom's go. I barely had a weekend last week, but as for my last few weeks in Blacksburg I cannot complain. The cases have been rewarding and I have learned a lot. I am more comfortable than I ever imagined I would be and I hope to learn more about horses as a hobby in the future. Lameness is so much more exciting when it is happening in a horse and not in a lecture.

Today I got to experience some alternative medicine therapies applied to chronic back pain; tomorrow I will massage my horse with a human electric massager! While I am nervous that I have been out of the small animal realm for a while before starting my internship, it will be a long time before I get to do this again and it's fun. I realize more each day that life really is the journey and not the destination, although reaching your destination is extremely fulfilling it's the journey that makes it that way.

9 more days of horses than off to work with wildlife. I cannot believe that my life as a veterinary student is coming to a close.

Only 2 Rotations Left!

2011-03-20T18:12:00.004-04:00

I have mentioned it before in recent postings, but I cannot tell you how odd it is to be happy and sad at the same time with a dash of disbelief on top. I can vividly remember second year feeling as if becoming a veterinarian was a path with an unattainable destination. Well the destination is heading toward me very quickly.

Recently on lab services, I have had time to do some activites with my 2 year old dog, Spokane. We are in the midst of grasping the sport of fly ball, starting the trail running season, and this weekend started agility lessons, with an amazing trainer in a beautiful Blacksburg setting. Of course as these activities start becoming rewarding for myself and my dog, they will need to wind down soon. While they can be continued when I return to Northern VA/Washington DC area, they will be more expensive, hectic to travel to, and impersonal. I am so grateful to everything this town has given me these 4 years, so here is a list for those Type-A's out there:

Blacksburg Greats:

Blue Ridge Parkway proximity- a vista, mountain, trail, friendly face at every mile
Pandapas Pond- best place on earth for biking and trail running
Virginia Tech's spirit- 3.2 for 32, VT football, VT vs Duke basketball, etc
Crossfit Blacksburg
Akke's Yoga Place & In-balance Yoga- Akke you kept me level-headed years 2&3
Blacksburg Farmer's Market-always seeing a friendly face and acquiring local goods
Nellie's Cave Park and all my neighbors- the unofficial offleash dog area
The lack of chain restaurants and quality of the independent restaurants-Gillie's, Souvlaki, Cellar, Cabo, Easy Chair, Bogens, Sal's, Sake House, Bangkok Bistro, Lefty's, Daily Bread
Roanoke Non-Ultra Trail Series & Roanoke's charm
The mountains all around at the end of hard day.

When I think of vet school, I think of the fun and my lifelong friendships that have developed and the sense of community I have never experienced before. I have tuned out the bad because at the end of this experience what remains is an appreciative, stronger (mentally and physically thx X-Fit), smarter, more confident, person, with a sense of self and better friends than I could have ever imagined. I will search the rest of my life to find those friends and community again; I wouldn't be at all surprised if in the end I return to Blacksburg.

There is a tension that develops inside all of us when facing a transitional period between what you are leaving behind and what lies ahead. I have chosen to embrace and feel that tension and it has helped face the reality that this crazy chapter of my life that has been so hard and so rewarding is coming to a close. I decided this week that I wanted to commemorate this time with a class ring, something I never thought or wanted to purchase before.

On a completely separate note, I enjoyed necropsy much better this week. I diagnosed Yew toxicity in a dog that died a sudden death and saw some other cool cases. I love histopathology (the microscopic aspect) and I may be coming around to gross pathology; however, I know for sure I do not want to be a pathologist when I grow up.

This week will involve more free time than I know what to do with. Time to pack, get organized and play wtih SPokane. Next block is primary care land of no life and horses, horses, horses.

Only 3 rotations left...Lab Services Finally Arrives

2011-03-07T20:34:00.004-05:00

Anesthesia was an absolutely busy and amazing block. One of my favorites and 3 weeks where I learned an exponential amount of material and gained amazing clinical experience. It was also my last small animal clinical block.

So here I am 2 days into laboratory services, the "vacation rotation." It has been exhausting due to an extremely high caseload of large animal necropsies. The last 2 days I have left after 5 PM, smelly, dirty and tired with homework to do and a dog to play with. I truly hope the caseload lightens up, I feel beaten down and too tired to be a good mom to Spokane and make time for exercise.

In the morning it is crash review of previous material from bacteriology, virology, toxicology, parasitology and clinical pathology. The -ologies coming back from the dead. What I remember amazes me, what I forgot depresses me. But reviewing the material is helpful and so far the instructors have made it fun.

In the afternoon, it's time to play Dexter. Each day we have had 1 horse and 1 cow, and because we do not have an incinerator cutting up the animals for disposal along with the odor are the worst parts. You get pretty messy (#1 dirtiest job ever) and it is physically taxing. I, for one, need knife use 101. I truly hope that Spokane's energy level decreases slightly and that we don't have this level of cases for the rest of the block. In the past few months, I have heard my classmates complain about no necropsy cases today; well I want that complaint.

While I enjoyed pathology classes in years 1 & 2, this rotation made it clear to me that becoming a pathologist is not my gig. Even clinical pathology, which I do love, is not something I would want to do exclusively. Slides are fun, but patients and critical care is much more fun. I keep reflecting on how open my mind was 3 years ago. While I feel a tad guilty to not be as open-minded as I once was, I feel good that I know where my strongest interests lie. It took a long time and a lot of exploration to get to this point. For that reason I beg, please no more horses to cut into pieces please.

Will the Real Vet School Please Stand Up?

2011-02-26T13:59:00.003-05:00

Before the start of 4th year, the clinical year of vet school at Virginia-Maryland, I heard horror stories of never sleeping, the pager going off in the middle of the night, etc. While I have had a few days or a week here and there of being stuck at the hospital and away from my bed and family, in reality it hasn't been too bad. There were maybe 3-4 nights where I was at school dealing with critical patients or emergency duty until the wee hours of the morning, 1-2 AM at worst. However, this week, the true vet school "horror story" reared its ugly head.

I was on call for anesthesia and due to an 8-hour shunt surgery case earlier in the day, the rest of the surgical cases were late into the OR for the rest of the day. My assigned case rolled into the operating room around 4PM, and for reasons that will go unmentioned, finished at 8:45 PM. The recovery went well, and I headed home for a bowl of cereal and some zzz's. Around 1:36 AM my cell phone rang. A colic (the second of my anesthesia rotation) needs to go to surgery. Luckily, or not, I was sent home around 4 AM to sleep for 2 hours until morning rounds, with the hope I would compete my case for the next day and be released home to finish my sleep.

Murphy's law continued to be in effect that day. We rolled the kitty into the MRI only to find the special MRI-compatible, recently serviced anesthesia machine was leaking some Isoflourane gas. Awesome. 2 hours later the MRI scan began. I was sent home promptly after the case was completed, however, I never got a lunch break and actually got home at 4PM, not very early after all.

On the bright side, I survived and performed better than I thought possible on only two 2 hour sessions of sleep. In fact, I was proud of myself for making it through, despite feeling like a cloud of bad luck was over my head for 36 hours. In addition, I still absolutely love my anesthesia rotation. I am extremely excited to be off the entire weekend. I have found it amazing that while the hospital has seen 4 colics in the past year, 2 have occurred when I am on call in the past 2 weeks. Dropping a horse is exciting, it's just not where I see my career headed, especially when I know first-hand now that colics really do occur in the middle of the night. But if life has taught me anything, it is that you never know where it will take you.

Special Guest Post by Veterinary Technician Tina Marconi

2011-02-21T13:18:00.001-05:00

3 Reasons Why Veterinarians Should Honor Thy Veterinarian Technician

Anyone with even the minimal knowledge of the medical field knows that saving lives and curing illnesses is a team effort – no one doctor or other health care professional is able to handle everything by themselves. It’s the same in a veterinary practice – no one can operate a one-man show unless they want to end up becoming overworked and unable to handle their cases with the required care and efficiency. This is why assistants and technicians are hired – to help out with a veterinarian’s practice, and just as nurses are important to the scheme of things in a people hospital, so too are veterinarian techs extremely important in the world of animal care.

Veterinarian’s who think they know it all and so abuse their techs and assistants or treat them badly should remember that unless they respect those who work for them:

· Their practice could go downhill: Veterinarians who don’t respect their assistants and techs could end up losing their services; no one wants to work for employers who don’t treat them well. And when the word gets around that the veterinarian in question can’t hold on to an assistant or technician, his/her practice begins to go downhill because no one wants to work with them. Overworked veterinarians are not effective, they soon start making mistakes, and they end up losing their clients because they are perceived as not being proficient at their job.

· They could lose regular customers: Veterinarian techs are not just responsible for assisting the veterinarian in all his/her tasks; they’re also the ones who liaise with clients, set up appointments and follow-up visits, and provide aftercare for animals that have undergone surgeries or which require hospitalization. So when a veterinarian does not respect his/her veterinarian tech, their unhappiness and dissatisfaction spills over to the client and patients, and soon enough, the regular ones too start looking for other veterinary practices to handle their pets.

· They tend to show the same attitude toward the animals they care for: Veterinarians are perceived to be kind and gentle people, simply because they’ve chosen to work with animals, creatures that cannot talk and must be handled with love and kindness. But if a veterinarian is abusive towards or does not respect the people who work for him/her, it stands to reason that they’re not going to adopt the right attitude when providing care for animals. They could be skilled and well-trained, but the clinical approach does not work well on animals that can sense hostility from a mile away. Veterinarians who are warm human beings make the best kind of animal doctors, and those who fail to respect their veterinarian techs and assistants may as well shut down their practice and find another occupation.

This guest post is contributed by Tina Marconi, she writes on the topic of online veterinarian tech programs . She welcomes your comments at her email id: tinamarconi85[@]gmail[.]com.

Let the Bittersweet Feelings Begin

2011-02-20T09:36:00.003-05:00

My anesthesia rotation has started off great! It has been really fun and an excellent learning experience. It is one block I felt adequately prepared for from the previous years and rounds are pertinent and helpful. We receive a lot of hands-on experience too, no resident in our way. For each patient we devise anesthetic drug protocols and as long as we can justify why, we can experiment (safely) with new drugs and ways to use them.

I performed my first successful epidural on a live patient Friday and it was very rewarding. I used multimodal pain management for a jaw fracture and the patient's plane of anesthesia was very stable. It was amazing to see how effective multimodal pain control can be. Many people think anesthetic gas=pain control, but it doesn't. Better pain management before, after and during surgery decreases anesthetic complications, the amount of gas needed to keep the patient in a good surgical anesthetic plane, and aids in recovery. Anyway, I have been learning a tremendous amount and loving it. The aspects I like are very applicable to critical care medicine and are making me more curious about a residency in critical care. I feel like I am starting a new career exploration journey in that respect.

As I sat in the small animal OR monitoring anesthesia last week, however, I had a moment when I realized I only had 2 more weeks in the small animal hospital. A wave of sentimental feeling and sadness came over me. In fact, as I spend some of my last days with good friends, I find that this feeling of sentiment for Blacksburg, vet school, vet school relationships and all the nuances of the teaching hospital is very strong. I am doing my best to savor the great things I have experienced the past 4 years. It will be hard to leave. I really have despite the long distance marriage and all the obstacles of vet school, loved my four years. I would not want to repeat it, but it was an amazing life changing experience. I cannot imagine having to go through all that I endured in any other town than Blacksburg.

At the same time, when I think of graduation weekend, I become giddy like a school girl. It is hard not to be proud and happy at the accomplishment of a DVM. Transitions are difficult for me, even with a strong plan in place. I hope that taking the time to savour the next 82 days will help make the transition back to life in Washington, DC a little bit easier.

Murmurs and Protocols

2011-02-15T20:48:00.003-05:00

My Cardiology/Dermatology rotation quickly became one of my favorites. My ECG reading ability improved, skin allergy understanding and diagnostic skills developed, andcardiac auscultation aural memory expanded. I was sad for the rotation to end.

Luckily, the first few days of anesthesia have been amazing. I really needed a refresher of the drugs, practice making my own sedation and pain management protocols, and clinically watching these drugs in action. The department personnel is amazing, with great energy, advice, and patience. No ICU duty is an added bonus to my enjoyment. I am assured I will learn an exponential amount this rotation and I am pretty excited about it in a nerdy way. Brand new protocols abound with Fentanyl CRI's with lidocaine, combining propofol with ketamine for induction, learning about new opioids, it's all fun and games!

Having anesthesia directly after cardiology and medicine rotations has made me realize why I love critical care and emergency medicine so much. It has made me question whether I will do a residency or not after my internship. I still stand by my position to practice for a few years before re-entering academia, but I am beginning to wonder whether further specialization is inevitable for me. One of the anesthesiologists believes it is. She told me to email her in 1-2 years letting her know I am pursuing a residency and she said it with such conviction I believed her.

Let the anesthesia fun continue. Life is good.

96 days Left and Life Post-Vet School is coming together.

2011-02-07T08:48:00.005-05:00

Today is February 7, 2011. A long awaited day in the veterinary profession for those awaiting placement in the internship and residency match program; for those in the know, today is "Match Day."

It is hard to believe I started as a kennel assistant at the Hope Center, a state of the art referral center and will be returning as a veterinarian. I could not be more excited to spend my first year as a doctor learning from some of the best doctors and working with amazing technicians!

Only 96 days remain before graduation. My remaining rotations include: anesthesia, equine services, and lab services and an external block at the Wildlife Center of VA. I feel I have made many strides as a senior student when I look back on the first few rotations, but I still have a lot to learn. Because transition periods can be hard for me, I am trying to reminisce as well as think of the future. It is easy to like vet school in retrospect, but it is also hard to forget the sheer exhaustion and stress that came with the ride.

I am only beginning to comprehend the reality that I set out 7 years ago to become a veterinarian and with boards and match day behind me that journey was a success. In addition, that journey was only the beginning of a long career of learning, helping animals, helping people, being frustrated and exhausted, fulfilled, and longing for boredom. Veterinary medicine is an amazing career, but it comes with a price. Balancing that price will be a challenge next year,but as I have learned the past 7 years, each difficult step forward prepares you for the next difficult step left to take.

I am so thankful to the clinicians that wrote my recommendations, were patient enough to teach me, and everyone who has believed in me. The experience came at the cost of a modest home, but truly has been priceless.

96 days left...

Small Animal Med Take 2: Better and more tiring than ever!

2011-01-15T20:52:00.002-05:00

Confession: I love small animal medicine. Despite the intense work that a critical patient requires, so far every case I have seen continues improving. This is quite a change from the usual depressing outcomes I have experienced this year. It has also made this a very rewarding and exhausting 2 weeks.

Confession: I need a work-life balance; I need to exercise, I need to get 8 hours of sleep, and I need to have some time with my family and friends. All of these things make me a much better vet student and person. What is amazing to me is that I have found the right career. In finance, I couldn't wait to leave to have "a life." Now despite being tired, run down and wanting "a life" I willingly sacrifice these things to my detriment for the benefit of my patient and I don't mind. It does make me cranky without the other aspects of life trickled in.

I have learned a lot this block. I have learned new material, more about patient care and decision making for critical patients. I have continued to confirm that I heart critical care, the challenges, the heartache and the reward. The cherry on top was passing the NAVLE!

Becoming a vet has never felt more real. It will become more real in a few weeks when I find out if I got into a match internship program that will confirm where I will be working as a doctor. While I am looking forward to some less intense blocks, I couldn't have asked for more out of my second small animal medicine block. 1 week left then onto cardiology!

2010 in Review

2010-12-27T19:59:00.006-05:00

Despite major east coast snowstorms, I made it from Blacksburg to Richmond to see my best friend and her newborn after 2+ years apart. It was amazing quality time, although this year's actual Christmas not being the most spirited for me. I was on emergency call Christmas eve. While only 1 non-urgent case was admitted, I was at the hospital most of the evening. Then Christmas Day I spent the morning at the hospital and Matt and I didn't do any presents. Matt also left Spokane's box o presents at the other house, so we had no way to pretend it was Christmas. Due to the lurking snowstorm, we decided to leave Blacksburg early Christmas evening. I was happy and relieved to make it to Richmond before the snow, but it wasn't the same holiday without Matt and the cats in our home. It was however, a fitting ending to the turbulent 2010.

Regretful Happenings of 2010:
My 2003 Honda Accord's transmission dies the day after Christmas 2009.
The ice and snow storm create significant water damage and headaches at the townhouse.
Matt takes a 20% pay cut for a few months in the fall.
My 1 week between 3rd and 4th year involves a trip to Boston to see my best friend, but a delayed volcanic cloud inhibits us from meeting up.
Garfield perforates his cornea during the 36 hours I am in Chicago and then endures a total of 3 eye surgeries and almost loses his right eye.
Spokane now resides with dad more than mom.

The Good of 2010:
New hybrid car that gets 40-50 MPG, but has no horsepower (or sunroof).
New hardwood floors, windows and paint job in the house.
Completed 3 academic years of vet school and try on the infamous blue senior coat.
Learned just what a trooper my Garfield really is.
Spent Friday's with Matt again for a few months.
Saw my best friend just before 2010 ends, and we vow to see each other at least once in 2011.
Travel to China for one of the most amazing cultural and veterinary experiences.
Lobbied on Capitol Hill for the welfare of animals.
Canoed the New River on a beautiful day.
Visited Jackson Hole, WY (on the downside Matt broke both wrists snowboarding).
Visited Fallingwater, finally.
Still no cavities for me.

New Hope for 2011:
A DVM degree with board certification
The right internship match
Matt's road to graduate school begins
No major illnesses for my pet family
Matt's 1997 Acura keeps on truckin'
We begin the part of our marriage where we live together again.
Isabelle gets the dental cleaning she deserves.

While 2010 created a lot of debt for us, on the whole like many hard times it made us all stronger. Who needs money anyway when you have 4 amazing pets, and a great husband. Thankfully, I'll be able to treat my own pets soon enough.

Back to the Grind and a Long Winter

2010-12-05T20:49:00.002-05:00

Vacation is officially over as I type from Blacksburg. It is 20 degrees here with snow and ice all around. My 4 days as an extern at the Hope Center were eye-opening. I started to feel like a doctor because I was being treated like one for the first time. I started writing practical medical records and became more proficient and slightly confident in my physical exam skills. I detected an abnormal kidney on palpation and did not miss that many things when the doctors reviewed my physical exam findings. I performed open chest and closed chest CPR, and saw everything from an abscess to pericardial effusion in just 4 days. I kept thinking I sort of know what I am doing, and my gosh, someone is going to pay me to do this in just 5 months! It was exciting.

Over vacation I got a chance to do more yoga than I have done in months, and it was amazing. I also spent time with Spokane and successfully taught her to shake, but the roll over is proving difficult. The gentle leader intro was a success as well. I saw some friends and family, but there as just not enough time spent with anyone. They will be there in May, although rumor has it I won't have too much free time either if I get an internship.

Now I begin community practice, a rotation I have been looking forward to for a while. It should be a little more like the real world then some of the other hospital rotations and propel me forward toward May 14!

In the meantime, I am in a state of limbo. With board results and the internship match program pending until early February the suspense is killing me. I am trying to channel back to 2006 when I had to wait a similar period of time to find out if I got a vet school interview. I recall the first few weeks hard to not think about it, but after that I was able to put it out of my mind. I'll miss you vacation, but with only 3 primary care rotations left I must persevere.

Vacation Block-the good, bad and ugly

2010-11-24T16:55:00.004-05:00

Small animal medicine, block, 9, ended very well. A very prestigious clinician agreed to write me a very strong letter of recommendation. Garfield's eye was healing well finally and I drove home. I visited some doctors, and spent the rest of my first week studying for the stupid NAVLE. Studying didn't help at all. The only thing that may have helped would have been memorizing the Merck Veterinary Manual, an impossible task for anyone without a genius IQ and photographic memory. After 7 hours, I left the exam center feeling depressed and brain fried, unsure that I would ever be a licensed DVM. I didn't talk to anyone but Matt for 2 days, I was so embarrassed, assured that I failed. I finally got the courage to call a fellow classmate and found out she felt the same way. In her self-doubt she looked up the statistics over the last 10 years and those in the top 25% of the class had a 100% pass rate. That made me feel a little better. Then I spoke to some other current DVM's and the story was the same. It was more trivia than clinically relevant questions, and no one was happy afterward. Feeling a little more confident I headed to my first internship interview. I believe this went very well and boosted my confidence. I am once again back to feeling how I did when I drove back to DC a week ago; excited about my career.

The vacation is flying by, but I have started to catch up with some old friends. I am getting a lot of sleep and am almost finished with my internship application. This weekend I will finally get to see my much-awaited Fallingwater by Frank Lloyd Wright. I am very excited. Matt will visit a graduate school he is considering. Next week I will be working out by day and externing at the Hope Center by night before heading back to school for community practice.

I have finally narrowed down my interests to general practice (there is something to be said for a balance between healthy and sick animals), emergency and critical care (it is what I know best and the initial thrill of stabilization and medicine is invigorating) and internal medicine ( I heart endoscopy). The 1 year internship will allow me to further explore these 3 fields and choose the one that is best for me. The beauty of it all, is that I know my preference may change over time, and all 3 fields are accessible with a DVM.

Here's hoping I passed the NAVLE by some miracle and get a great internship next year. It will all be known by early February, just over 2 months away.

Small Animal Medicine- So Far So Good

2010-11-05T15:54:00.005-04:00

It is the end of my second week of small animal medicine and it has been very enjoyable and only a little depressing. I do believe, however, that soft tissue surgery has toughened me up a little bit. The all-intimidating rounds have gone well thus far and are actually fun and great learning opportunities.

I do truly enjoy medicine and the challenges and I absolutely love the eondscope, but again I find that the healthy patient is refreshing to see.

In the meantime, Garfield had a second prophylactic surgery in his right eye that did not go well. He had a second procedure to try to re-do the graft that seems to be doing better, but not healing as well as the other "emergency eye." I will second-guess the decision, but it is clear that that eye is diseased and we did the surgery to provide the best care for him, even if the outcome made the situation worse. Poor little cat. He has many days ahead of trips to the vet, eye medications, and e-collar fashion. Hopefully, he will not lose this eye in the end.

As NAVLE and internship application time approaches I am a little more optimistic that I will get some strong recommendations needed to secure a good internship in the Washington area.

Soft Tissue Surgery Part 2

2010-11-05T15:47:00.005-04:00

The rest of soft tissue surgery was not quite as depressing, but was busy. I no longer think I am cursed, but learned the hard way that death and disease are the nature of the job. The past 2 blocks I have realized that there may be something more appealing to general practice. Perhaps the healthy puppy vaccine visit is a needed break from diagnosing cancer or untreatable diseases.

The last week of surgery was a combined orthopedics/soft tissue service due to the surgeon conference. It was pretty busy, I got another liver case, a gallbladder rupture, which did well post-op. My last patient was an emergency and an uplifting story. A dog was found with an arrow in its chest and abdomen. We removed the arrow surgically, which miraculously did not penetrate any organs other than a small defect in the diaphragm and I got to spay her at the same time. She came in to the hospital slightly feral and panicky and left as a healthy, female spayed, super sweet dog with a true home.

Soft Tissue Depression Week 1

2010-10-08T17:31:00.005-04:00

My first week on soft tissue surgery has been one of the hardest weeks of my life. I have not exercised all week, I haven't eaten a true dinner all week, and I have seen a lot of poor prognoses and death.

My first day of the block we diagnosed a dog with splenic neoplasia and the owner elected euthanasia. My next case was the cutest Pomeranian ever. He had Adrenal Cushing's disease and came for an adrenalectomy. The mass was very large and intimately associated with the vena cava and the renal vein...out came the kidney too. His recovery was a disaster. I was with him in ICU all day until 1AM. The next morning I walked in at 6:15 to find out he had just passed. The owners were so sad but grateful. He was a legend in our hospital because he had his own human wheelchair to be pushed around. He had a ton of personality, and was loved like a child. He apparently was also included in TJ MAXX employee newsletters as their mascott.

My most promising case was a 13 year yorkie who had a liver mass removed and was doing better. 30 minutes before the owners arrived he had a seizure. We did a further workup on him the next day to find he has multiorgan failure, DIC, and half his spleen needs to be removed and he is a horrible candidate. He also likely has central vestibular (brain) disease. For lack of a better outcome he is going home to be with his owners for the time he has left.

My last case of the week is a super cool cat, with never seen before biliary cystic disease that could not be removed surgically and may not resolve medically. I got to do a lot during the surgery and place a feeding tube, but the owners are distraught over his unknown prognosis and what we don't know.
Note: All 3 cases written with owner's permission.

Between stress, lack of sleep, and poor outcomes I am depressed. Seeing Spokane last night was such a breath of fresh air. To see an healthy happy lively dog made me so grateful. I hope the coming weeks have slightly more optimistic cases. I gave me a lot to consider in terms of career choices, and dealing with death and disease on an emotional level.

My own little ophtho case

2010-10-08T17:23:00.003-04:00

The reason there have been no new posts in over 3 weeks is simple, many other issues have come in between me and my blog. The most important was my first hand experience with an ophtho emergency.

I traveled to Chicago for a Pfizer career workshop and hired a cat-sitter to watch my 3 buds. When I returned home Saturday at 12 am, I found Garfield with his eye shut and filled with pus. When I attempted to open his eye he screamed and tried to bite me. I have never seen an animal in such pain. My second attempt to help him was the same. I debated whether it was an emergency, and wished I had my DVM to get him pain meds ASAP. I decided not to call the clinicians grading me at 12 AM Sat night, but did call first thing that morning. Upon exam, he had perforated his cornea due to corneal degeneration and lipid keratopathy. His other eye had extremely thin corneas as well, and is at a high risk of perforating. He went to surgery right away and did very well. An a-cell implant was placed (pig bladder tissue) and a conjunctival graft was sewn to his cornea. He has been a trooper. In order to treat him 4 times a day he came to school with me every day. He purred from his cage and let ophtho examine him without a fuss. He will likely need a second procedure to prevent the other eye from perforating, but we would like this eye to heal.

In an ode to Garfield, this poor cat has a heart murmur with a possibility of developing hypertrophic cardiomyopathy, FLUTD with a history of blocking, herpes, and now this serious ocular condition. He is quite the trooper and special guy though. I am so proud of him and how well he is done. He doesn't even mind his e-collar.

Ophtho went well. I do not want to be an ophthalmologist, but I really enjoyed learning about eyes and seeing some successful cases.

Ophthalmology Week 1

2010-09-16T20:56:00.003-04:00

The first 2 days of this block were insanely busy. My first day I had 3-4 appointments and a consult for a dog with Blastomycosis. The second day I had 2 surgeries, and both nights I came in at 10 PM to do eye treatments. The last couple of days have slowed down thankfully. The learning curve for using the instruments is pretty steep, and we are all a little intimidated. We have had a few sessions to practice, but looking at the eye closely is tough work. Then figuring out how to characterize what yous see with ophtho vocab is even harder. The clinicians and residents have been great and very fun to work with. Singing Jack Johnson and Usher while removing an eye was fun stuff. On top of that, I could also get use to surgery while sitting down.

Today I watched a cataract surgery and a surgery for a melting corneal fungal ulcer in a horse. That was pretty neat. Horses are less scary when they are asleep and he recovered really well. We put a graft over the defect, which was also neat to watch.

I hope I get marginally better with eye exams over the next 2 weeks. Tomorrow we have a lot of recheck appointments, including a Boxer with an indolent ulcer. I doubt I will be a slit lamp expert anytime soon, but I will just keep on trying. The eye is very complex and interesting, and challenging.

Orthopedic Surgery coming to a close

2010-09-08T19:29:00.003-04:00

It is the middle of the last week of Block 6, and I have to admit I am a little sad. I have truly enjoyed orthopedic surgery about 50 times more than I thought I would. I am still a little intimidated by TPLO/TTA surgeries and pre-surgical measurements, but I have loved fracture fixation techniques. Tomorrow I will see possibly my last case on the block for a problem with the dog's jaw. While my orthopedic exam still has a ways to go, I have much improved over the block. Each day I enjoyed interacting with clients, their pets, and watching them regain use of their bones/limbs. Today I saw arthroscopic shoulder surgery that was amazing and a carpal arthrodesis. Tomorrow I will give my presentation on physical rehabilitation of animals.

The slower pace of the service has helped me enjoy the block, and I have not taken that for granted. I have fit many nap times into my schedule somehow, and last weekend I had most of the weekend completely off. That left me time to sleep in on Sunday, canoe the New River, and play with my fabulous pup.

My next 3 week romp will be with ophthamology and the amazing Dr. Pickett. I am excited for that busy service as well. I certainly started enjoying 4th year in the VTH this block and I hope my enjoyment continues. The NAVLE exam is 2 months away and I need to start spending more time studying on the weekends. Speaking of which it is time to get started with an evening session...

Orthopedic Surgery 1

2010-08-31T19:56:00.003-04:00

Wow, I cannot believe it's been 18 days since my last entry. To catch up, I finished off neurology with some interesting cases, but the communication among clinicians was a little frustrating. We can just leave it at that. I did learn that corneal ulcers as a result of anesthesia, however, do occur, and can progress quickly.

My first week of orthopedic surgery was organized, fun, and a success. I had my first favorite patient, a well-behaved sweet sheltie with a rheumatoid polyarthropathy that needed a bone plate removal. We removed a bone plate that was infected, and the owners were the nicest people. I also repaired a calcaneal fracture on a cat, and even got to drive the IM pin.

Week 2 has started off a little rougher however. Monday we had a very slow caseload, and I was tired from attempting a 5:30 am crossfit class. We were released early and I took a nap, studied for boards and rounds and still went to bed at 9:30. Today I admitted my one patient for a cranial cruciate partial tear (expected), and took on a GDV on emergency (unexpected). Sadly, she was euthanized on the table. I practiced suturing her up by myself and returned her to her owner.

After surgery I was hypoglycemic, tired, and disappointed. Ortho was not suppose to be a sad block and I was expecting a better outcome, despite that GDV is often life compromising. I was so excited to see a surgery, I asked for the case. Afterward, I thought to myself why on earth did I want that case? I enjoyed learning about how to proceed with this surgery and emergency care beyond just passing the stomach tube which I have done in the past. I just could use some more happy outcomes than sad outcomes these days. I am beginning to think I am bad luck in cases with a poor likelihood of recovery.

I truly hope there will be many better days with better outcomes. I may defer treating future dogs named Maggie for a while. I am 0 for 2 in just 2 weeks.

I hope tomorrow has a better ending. Joys of 4th year continue...

Feast or Famine

2010-08-12T18:49:00.007-04:00

This week started off with a bang. On Monday, I had 1 case, but the bureaucracy of a teaching hospital made me run around like a crazy person to work the case up. The dog had disc disease in the cervical spine, but needed an MRI to see if surgery was a viable option. The owners had a hard time deciding if they should do the MRI and put their 15 year old dog, who is otherwise in good health, through an MRI and possibly surgery. They decided to get answers. Two days later en route to the imaging center, however, they turned around and decided his time was done and euthanized him. While I know how much they cared for the dog and the cost was steep, they wrote him off because of age. Old age is not a disease and he very well had 1-2 good years left. It was disappointing and the news came after an even more disappointing Tuesday.

On Tuesday, we admitted a lab for a clinical treatment trial for a brain tumor. The procedure went very well and his recovery from anesthesia went well at first. Two hours after waking up, he had a seizure which we caught early. The second seizure did not respond to valium and we put him on a CRI of propoflo. After 6 hours we took him off the propoflo and he did fine, but 30 minutes later he went into cardiac arrest and died. He died of aspiration pneumonia caused by delayed gastric emptying. It was such a shame to see a dog with a brain tumor die of aspiration pneumonia. The reality of how common this occurs as a complication to anesthetic procedures hit me hard. I really held out hope that he would make a great recovery and live out some time with a shrunken brain tumor. Before the necropsy, I also wasn't sure if it was our fault for not intubating him while he was on the CRI of propoflo. Around 7 pm his heart rate picked up, blood pressure spiked, and his oxygen saturation was low. I knew something was wrong, but the doctors elected that he was okay. I now know it couldn't have been prevented or alleviated. He had a full stomach, but hadn't eaten in 12 hours before surgery, so something else was going on. He was an amazing dog with a dedicated owner and the story was tragic for me.

Besides being exhausted from 13 hour days, I was questioning how I would get through this year on lack of sleep and so much mental stimulation. For the millionth time in vet school, I was wondering "can I do this?"

Of course the latter half of this week our neurology service caseload has slowed down, perhaps someone looking out for me or just pure luck. I appreciate that I had time to process my feelings and get rest. I am terrfiied of surgery next block though, when a day off will cease to exist.

My mid-block evaluation went well. I need to "own" my cases more, and be more independent of the clinician, which has come a long way since last Monday, but has a long way to go. I have no clue how I will be ready to be a DVM in just 9 months. Time to take things just 1 day at a time again.

Back to Vet School and the "Real" 4th Year

2010-08-08T19:44:00.002-04:00

Sadly, my 2 blocks of personal growth and development are over, and so are the fun and games. I am so happy and fulfilled that I had both of those amazing opportunities in China and at the Humane Society, but it was time to learn how to become a doctor. After my first week back, I realized how much I have to learn.

I was humbled by how difficult it was to take an accurate history. I was also so nervous meeting clients and trying to do a complete physical exam in front of them. I missed tons of things, most that were obvious, like the patient was dehydrated. I had major confidence issues that I haven't had since high school and it showed to my clinicians. Most importantly, I have no idea how I will pass boards or be a doctor in less than 3 months and a year, respectively.

On a positive note, my first discharge and SOAP's were pretty good and by the end of the week things were turning around. My shifts in ICU went well since my main exprience was working as an emergency technician. I also really enjoyed following up with clients on the phone.

What makes 4th year so hard is that you are part student, part technician, and part doctor (or trying to be). Who has time to wear that many hats and sleep? It's also hard because your best friends may not be around for the support they provided the 3 years before. This weekend I remembered why my vet school friends are so amazing.

I miss having a life, but I got some reprieve with the terrific Steppin' Out Festival in town with friends Friday and Saturday night and a lazy Sunday with Matt and our dog. It's been 1 year since I brought her home from Washington and she now listens off leash. She is a great compliment to our family.

The hours are long again. I had an 18 hour welcome back Monday and 12 hour days except for Friday. The best part is you're suppose to read for rounds and study for boards on top of that! The truth is compared to surgery, that isn't even as bad as it will get. Finding time and energy to work out or eat was difficult. I will just do my best and take it one day at a time. I will also enjoy neurology since next block is surgery and having a life and sleeping will be harder to do.

Lobby Day Recap

2010-07-29T14:23:00.003-04:00

Lobby Day with the Humane Society was an excellent culmination of the Taking Action for Animals Conference. My day began by leading some citizen lobbyists from the hotel to the Russell Senate Building. 11 fellow Virginians and I strategized on our approach for our joint meeting with Senators Webb and Warner's staff. The meeting went very well. Webb's staffer had some tough questions and wanted data and support, while Warner's staffer was much more warm and fuzzy about our animal issues. Nonetheless, we learned at the end of the meeting that Webb's staffer was shocked by the puppy mill information we provided. He expressed that he was now bnervous about where he and his girlfriend should look to get a puppy. Some of the constituents said I was an excellent leader and well-spoken. I was flattered, and only hope to improve in that respect. I was proud of myself, because I added the public health risks to children regarding unvaccinated and non-dewormed puppies. If someone is not an animal advocate, they usually cannot argue the public health side. It was my version of thinking on my feet and again an outgoing moment for me.

The Rally was fun and the weather, thankfully, was not too hot. Wayne spoke first and got the crowd pumped up. Wendi Mallick, from the TV show "Hot in Cleveland" spoke out on the ROAM Act. The ROAM Act (Restore Our American Mustangs) looks to end round-ups and slaughter of wild horses and burros, by implementing a immunocontraception program.
The Rally concluded with Rep. Jim Moran. I was told beforehand that he is a staunch supporter of our issues, but sometimes goes off on odd tangents during his speeches. This speech was no exception. Toward the end of his speech he started to bash the NRA, which is okay with me and funny, but seemed a little inappropriate.

I missed photo ops with Wendi to rush off to my 1 pm meeting with a staffer from my Rep. Boucher's office. She was very nice and I thanked him for being a co-sponsor on the PUPS Act, and voting in favor of many of our issues. She told me that Boucher heard from his constituents that they were upset about puppy mills and he listened. "All it takes is a few calls from his constituents and he listens and acts, she informed me." I mentioned the upcoming Truth in Fur Labeling House vote (which passed yesterday!), and started awareness on the Prevention of Equine Cruelty Act. As many people are, the staffer was outraged that some of her faux fur, is quite possibly real fur. Thank goodness for consumer protection loopholes.

After my last meeting, I walked back to our home base in Russell 385 and felt a slight let down that it was all over for the day. I really enjoyed meeting with the offices and felt for the first time what democracy can feel like. To be able to make an appointment and walk into my senators or congressman's office and voice my opinion was amazing. It would never happen in China.

Taking Action For Animals Conference: A Summary

2010-07-27T12:12:00.010-04:00

Attending TAFA was invigorating, representing the Humane Society of the United States at TAFA was an honor. The workshops were very well-run and informative. Topics ranged from how to be an active citizen lobbyist, how to stop puppy mills, to advances in farm animal cruelty prevention and .

Many other organizations were represented on each panel in the many different workshops, including Farm Sanctuary, Animal Welfare Institute, among others.

The all vegan menu was surprisingly delicious and included a vegan rendition of chicken cordon bleu and chocolate mousse.

Working at the registration booth Friday night reminded me of working retail during my college days, but it was fun. I ran into a girl, Nicole, who was on my RAVS trip last summer. She won the award for HSVMA student of the year. She created a student chapter of HSVMA and helped to end terminal surgeries at her vet school. Her work inspired me to try to form a HSVMA Chapter at my vet school before I leave.

While working the government affairs table, I discovered a new side of myself. I was energized by the many interested citizen lobbyists, and those that may not have been interested in our lobby day bills I actively chose to engage. I urged people that could not attend lobby day to cal or write their senators and representative. I learned that 1 personal call or letter statistically represents 10,000 people with the same interest. So 1 call really does matter!

In another outgoing moment, I spoke to Nigel Barker and asked for a photo op. His work as a celebrity spokesperson, filmmaker and photographer has helped to end baby seal hunting in Canada.

The banquet was great. Congressmen Rahall from WV gave a great speech and we commended him for passing 11 wildlife bills through his committee during 2010. Hal Sparks was hilarious and I laughed harder than I had in a very long time. Wayne's speech was passionate and serious, but was interrupted by Spanish music in the adjacent ballroom. All the speeches made me question my own choices and made me wish our country was more in line with change. Wayne argues that the American public is ready, but government and interest groups are slowing the change process.

While the conference was exhausting on many levels, I am not only glad I was able to attend but that I was able to represent the Humane Society. And once again during the last 6 weeks, I feel invigorating and passionate for my career and all the many directions I can take.

1st Day on Capitol Hill With HSUS

2010-07-15T10:45:00.012-04:00

I returned from China with a greater appreciation for the freedom, wealth and opportunities we have in this country. For example in China, high school students take an exam similar to our SAT exam. Their 2 day performance on this test determines their entire future. It determines the college they attend and the major that is chosen for them based on their performance. In China your occupation is selected for you and almost all people are grateful for school and a job. They do not think about if they are fulfilled and passionate about their career they are thankful for food and their job and learn to like it. While my one Chinese friend, Nicole, may go against the grain and change her career, this is the main way of thinking. Another friend I met in China is lucky to major in Spanish because that is her interest, but the college that was selected for her is an engineering school with a brand new Spanish department. She will probably not be able to study abroad in Spain or South America because no exchange programs have been created yet. She expressed that learning Spanish in China is difficult, and this is a major disadvantage.

So for the reasons above, among many others, I am proud and privileged to be an American. Yesterday, however, I was frustrated to be an American. Despite wealth and intelligence, important and pressing issues may not advance and I am baffled as to why.

I attended the 3rd of 3 hearings concerning antibiotic resistance. Coincidentally, during my animals and public policy course last year I presented a paper on the urgency and precedence this issue must take in order to keep our antibiotics working for animal and human health. There were so many frustrations I do not exactly know where to start, so I will list them out:

3 Republican Representatives slammed the Obama Administration's health care reform bill (not the issue to be discussed) then left the room.
1 Representative discussed his own agenda with an expert witness from the FDA-Center for Veterinary Medicine regarding FDA jurisdiction over the illegal importation of counterfeit pharmaceutical drugs. He left the room after his time was finished.
Despite a co-Chairman of this subcommittee, who was present at the meeting, raising the identical question of "Can antibiotic resistance in animals be passed to be people?" in 1980, there was debate over there has been enough peer-reviewed scientific evidence to enable Congress to act on this topic. 30 years have gone by and we are in the same place, only with more antibiotic resistance in humans and people.
The argument was made that low-doses of tetracyclines in food animals increases their health without creating resistant organisms. What does vet school teach you in clinical pharmacology- low doses of any antibiotic in any living animal creates only resistance.
One Representative stated, "Animal and human health are like apples and oranges." This statement had me enraged. How uneducated can you be. Animals carry the food-borne diseases that make us sick. In addition, if you want to use an ignorant analogy like that, a smarter way would be to say, " Animal and human health are like a granny smith and a red delicious apple."
The representative for the AVMA stated there is not enough evidence to either prove or disprove that antibiotic resistance in animals is transferred to humans. Directly to her left was a veterinarian who works for the AVMA, who stated that in her professional experience she has seen many accounts that animal diseases with resistant strains of campylobacter have created human outbreaks of campylobacter that then did not respond to traditional antibiotic therapies. By the way, she also had a 3 inch binder of epidemioloigc studies.
When asked the question, "Is there any scientific debate that antibiotic resistance in animals is transferred to humans?," the chief veterinary officer of CDC, the head of USDA-APHIS, and the head veterinarian for FDA all answered "No there is not."
"World Health organization studies are irrelevant to American data."

I left very frustrated and frightened for the future. After 30 years, we still debate what 3 experts declare is not debatable instead of moving forward to protect an important class of drugs. I personally believe our government is too large and parties too divided with too many self-serving interests groups with money controlling the power or re-election to function properly.

I hope my next days on the Hill are a little more promising..and relevant.

Tai Tien China and Ni Hao USA

2010-07-12T15:52:00.002-04:00

While I miss my family very much and want to finish my veterinary degree, I am reluctant to leave China. Over the past 2 weeks I have started making Chinese friends and they are amazing. Chinese hospitality for guests is like nothing I have ever experienced. I have also finally gotten comfortable going out alone; it only took 2+ weeks. I started becoming accustomed to the mental stimulation of just walking down the street.

My ultrasound work and anesthesia presentations went very well. The panda base definitely wants more vet students in the future and found it very helpful. I watched Luoli get much more comfortable with ultrasound, and she said she would continue ultrasounding the one pregnant panda we started working with.

The director of the panda base saw me off with a wonderful dinner of Chengdu tradition of hot pot. My flavor tolerance for spicy food increased like everyone told me and I impressed myself and my hosts with the amount of spicy food I could eat and enjoy.

I got to visit the Moon bear rescue center outside Chengdu. This is a reserve for bears involved in the medicinal bear bile trade. Bear farms are legal in China, but are slowly closing with the help of Animals for Asia. The treatment of these animals is appalling. They have permanent catheters or fistulas in their livers to collect bile. Most of them are cage-ridden for life and develop liver cancer and skin sores. Some bears develop worse medical conditions. Animals for Asia (www.animalsasia.org) works with the Chinese government to shut down one farm at a time. China feels they cannot outlaw all of them at once because of the financial ruin it would cause to the farm owners.

I was disappointed that this isn't really exposed to the American public and hope that I can increase awareness to have this animal mistreatment stopped. The bear center is amazing. These bears have unlimited enrichment and medical care to live out the rest of their lives peacefully.

There is so much more I could write about, but I have to re-adjust to life as an American, which I appreciate more than ever. In summary, my 3 weeks in China were as life-changing as I hoped they would be. Being there fueled my passion to practice international veterinary medicine in the future. The East will need the help of Western-trained vets in species conservation and fighting zoonotic diseases.

I was blessed with the opportunity to create life long friendships on the other side of the world. Because I couldn't travel around the country, I am excited to go back to see more of Asia and China and to continue working as veterinarian in the future.

Lao Wai in Chengdu

2010-07-01T20:45:00.002-04:00

I think things have been going pretty well. There is some down time, as the previous student here had told me, but that was to be expected. I have been working mainly with Lou Li, a Chinese vet, ultrasounding 1-3 pandas per day. In the non-pregnant pandas I am able to find the uterus, bladder, colon pretty easily. We were allowed to work on 1 pregnant panda and it hasn’t been as successful. They do not want to use alcohol because the pandas lick it, and this panda scratches the gel on as soon as you apply it. I also messed up yesterday by not cleaning her fur that we shaved off very well, so then it was getting stuck in the gel. Besides all of those issues, which are normal when working with animals, I can locate her bladder, but seem to be lost looking for other structures, which could be because she is pregnant. Lou Li is not mad at all and we will try again today.

We were talking about my last week and Lou Li seemed a little sad and asked if more of us will come. I said this is a trial program of what we hope to be a yearly exchange if it was helpful to you. She quickly and emphatically made it clear that she has enjoyed having us and hopes other students will come, so that was certainly a good sign. Mr. Wang Cheng Dung had attended 2 ultrasounds and seems a little frustrated to see the distinct outlines of each structure on ultrasound, which is not always possible, but I try. We all decided that I should give a presentation with our saved ultrasound images labeling the different structures, but the memory card doesn’t seem to fit in any of our computers, so we’ll see what happens with that.

There are 2 other Americans at the base, one is Chinese –American and it has been a blast to be with her. She and her family friend took me out last night for street food on Jin-Li and it was very fun. It felt good to be a tourist with locals who speak the language, and eat some pretty darn good albeit weird Chinese food.

Last night, on the panda base, and part of the time I was in Emei Shan are the few times I have felt comfortable being a foreigner or “lao wai.” I had been told it was derogatory by Americans. In the taxi last night I heard my friend say lao wai and the taxi driver say it. My Chinese friend kept saying, Chinese people like foreigners. This was conflicting since I hear “ lao wai” everywhere I walk. There is some interesting debate on this word (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laowai), but my friend and the courtesy they showed me last night proved to me that it cannot be derogatory unconditionally.

As my last week in China approaches, I am both a little remorseful and a little home sick. I am craving a sandwich like none other, but have been truly happy working outside of my comfort zone. I am also very proud of myself for coming here and handling many of the adventures China has provided to me. I really have only had 1 rough day so far, not to shabby.

This weekend I am going to an ex-patriot restaurant to see how Westerners hang out in Chengdu, a Buddhist organic farm, and some more tourist temples, tea and shopping on Sunday. I toyed with the idea of seeing some blue-sky China, but figured I should see some of the fun aspects of Chengdu before I go. As I keep reminding my travel-loving self, this is a trip for veterinary and cultural experience. If I want to more extensively travel, I have to come back. It is comforting to know, I now have a good Chinese friend to travel with if the next opportunity crosses my path in the future.

Week 1 in China: A Summary

2010-06-28T00:34:00.002-04:00

While I feel very homesick this morning, I have to report that my first week in China was a success on many levels. First and most importantly, I have learned to adapt to being outside my comfort zone. I also proved to myself that mental preparation is invaluable in surviving outside of the comfort zone. I have learned a lot already about Chinese culture, veterinary medicine, and how they value their animals, especially the giant pandas. The language barrier is a little harsher than I had hoped, but by the end of last week I think I befriended a few Chinese veterinarians at the base. The funniest thing is if Chinese people don’t speak English they just keep talking to you in Chinese as if you will somehow understand.

A list of Chinese habits that are outside my Westernized comfort zone:

o Spitting inside buses and buildings

o Amusement at animal taunting

o Lack of overall bathroom hygiene- the closer they come the louder they yell

o Eastern squat toilets and no toilet paper

o Rivers of raw sewage running through town

o Honking constantly

o Driving on any side of the road

o Lack of English in well- touristed areas

o Minimal veterinary medical training and understanding of physiology, anesthesia, and antibiotic use

o Whole pig carcasses carried by scooter

…to mention a few

My adventure to Emeishan was most certainly an adventure. It included hooking up with an Irish couple backpacking through Asia, staying in a monastery, numerous and sometimes scary macaque encounters, many sets of stairs, and discovering I do not like to travel alone. I am very glad I decided to travel there this weekend. It was a little more exuberant and adventurous than I bargained for at times, but in retrospect it was one of the cooler things I have done in my life. At no point other than a stand off with a nasty macaque out for human food, did I feel unsafe. For anyone thinking of braving travel in China alone, however, speaking the language even just a little bit can go a very long way to enjoying yourself more.

This week at the panda base will involve more ultrasound, possibly on the pregnant pandas and ivermectin treatments. I am also working on presentations on anesthetic monitoring and the importance of a manual CBC. There is a training for the zoo staff in Macau this week because they will be getting 2 pandas, so it will be a busy week at the base.

China Week 1

2010-06-24T09:06:00.000-04:00

Ni hao from Chengdu. After a very long 20+ hours of travel I arrived at the apartment in North Chengdu, Sichuan Province. The next day was a little rough in terms of jet lag, in fact I didn’t sleep well my first 2 nights which reminded me of Lost in Translation. I struggled through the jet lag and got lunch and some groceries. A little RMB goes a long way here in China. People are nicer than I thought they would be. They also stare at foreigners. The children are funny, they stare and giggle and say hello in English. The bicyclists and mopeds try to run you over and crossing the street is pretty much like playing frogger. The first few days I walked out of the apartment smiling. Being in China is certainly a novelty to me, and while communication can be difficult, it has been fun.

I am proud of myself. I definitely mentally prepared to be outside of my comfort zone. I miss paper towels and cheese, but am doing okay for the most part in terms of culture shock.

The panda base is outside the city and is in a pretty setting. It is essentially like a giant and red panda zoo. The red panda exhibits are very crowded. They are nicknamed lesser pandas by the Chinese, but I think they are exquisite creatures. Many of them have tail injuries from fights and stress behaviors. The giant pandas are truly amazing creatures, appearing gentle and playful. The Chinese covet the giant panda, but the respect for animals, while changing is not on the same level as it is in America. The best way to explain this is to understand that training to be a veterinarian is simply like majoring in vet med in college. They only go to post-high school for 4 years to be a vet and many basic physiology and pharmacology concepts are missed. So while I am here to help with ultrasound, which I have been doing a lot of, I can help in many other little ways.

I help with translating documents for the panda base visitors. I started explaining to them the importance of looking at a blood smear, instead of just relying on the machine’s numbers. I plan to give a presentation on the importance of anesthetic monitoring. I will help research articles for reproductive topics they are interested in. I have been showing them how to use some of their machines, including the ultrasound.

I am by no means an ultrasound expert, but there are some basic principles I can teach them. I am very happy to be here and I hope at the end of 3 weeks they are happy to have had me here as well. I have to say being so close to the pandas is very fun and ultrasounding them is also fun. Many of the pandas have been trained to lie on their backs for us, it has been very impressive.

Every day has been an adventure and so far I am so glad I decided to take the risk and come here.

This weekend I will take a trip to Emeishan a UNESCO world heritage site and holy buddist mountain. I am going alone, but hope to find some English speakers at a Western-friendly hostel when I get into the town. Sarah, an American who works in the conservation education office at the panda base is taking me to the bus station, and then I hope it’s as tourist friendly as the guide books say it is. I will have my Chinese-English dictionary just in case.

Here’s to a great week 1 in China and hopefully a fun weekend trip.

China here I come!

2010-06-16T18:58:00.002-04:00

The next 6 weeks are going to be exciting and bittersweet. I have one more day of radiology. I have learned a ton, but I worry if I don't use it I will lose it. I hope to successfully pass the exam tomorrow. If I don't pass, I have to repeat the entire block:( Fingers crossed.

The other bittersweet reason is that I am going to miss the Blacksburg community. I will miss my yoga class, Crossfit, the summer solstice festival this weekend, among other fun things. I also worry about learning the real hospital paperwork during block 5, after most people have learned what's going on and how to write SOAPs, and who gets what copy of the numerous forms we are forced to complete in a state-run teaching hospital.

On the other hand, I am very excited to experience a new country, practice ultrasound, and work with the amazing giant and red pandas. This experience was one of my dreams when I first applied to vet school, so the reality of it coming t fruition is very exciting.

I am suppose to have internet access in China, so I hope to post pictures and blog posts with how it is going.

Until then, to a safe flight, safe drive back to DC, and success on my radiology interpretive exam!

Radiology and a 5 Year Wedding Anniversary

2010-06-06T22:32:00.003-04:00

My "radiation vacation" has been interesting. I have enjoyed the parts of the day that are structured and involve learning, but there is a lot of downtime where I feel overwhelmed. I know I should be studying, but I cannot focus anywhere in the department and am unsure where to start. Rounds were intimidating because we had to interpret on the fly, but a good learning experience. Tomorrow is exam 1 of 2, which I have been studying for much to my dismay. I really find studying for tests boring now, but enjoy looking up areas related to current clinical cases. I hope I do respectably tomorrow morning on the first test at least, especially since it is "review." I will revisit the concept of "review" material in my next post. I will say it is very funny how much "review" material can appear brand new after only 1-2 years.

My 5th wedding anniversary was fun. An exotic vacation would have been nice, but we had a wonderful all-local dinner at the Bank is Pearisburg Friday evening. Saturday we got a late start but headed out for some day hikes on the Blue Ridge Parkway. Ironically, we got lost on our first stop to an elusive Nature Conservancy waterfall hike and got directions at Amhrein winery, which was my original anniversary date plan, but they had no events going on that day. The hike freaked me out for some reason, and we left. We climbed the Peaks of Otter and had a great time and great views from the top. We stopped for dinner at Thelma's Chicken and Waffles, which was delicious and then wearily wandered back home.

Sunday was just another Sunday like the past 3 years. Grocery, study for test, lay with dog, laundry, etc. I do not miss those days. Luckily only 1 other block has exams. Next year, however, 4th years could be taking an exam after each block. I do not envy them.

1 Block Down 16 more to go

2010-05-31T13:58:00.002-04:00

It is hard to believe that block 1 is over. It was one of my most feared blocks and turned out to be very enjoyable. I started to love head catching cattle in the chute. I became more comfortable injecting and drawing blood from larger animals. I fell in love with goats as both production and pet animals. I spent some time driving around various parts of the beautiful state of Virginia and enjoyed some lovely spring weather. I rose early and went to bed early.

The block started off bumpy and ended smoothly. I wish I had seen more medicine cases, but that is the luck of the draw. I still had a good time doing herd health and reproductive medicine with some pretty amazing farmers in some pretty nice facilities. I truly wish I had had some clinical experience with production management sooner because I may have consider being a mixed animal tracker. While I did not always like learning about production animal medicine, doing it was much more fun than I would have imagined. The clinicians made it fun as well.

The block ended with a Memorial Day weekend cookout at Dr. Schramm's new abode, complete with a relaxing dip in a hot tub and a locally grown steak for the husband. It doesn't get much more American than that.

Next block is radiology, also known as radiation vacation. I hope to learn a lot and significantly improve in my radiographic interpretation skills. I will also be sneaking in to get some ultrasound experience if possible.

Here's to block 2!

An Illusion to Lost

2010-05-24T20:47:00.003-04:00

Since Lost was with me before vet school and during vet school I thought it apropos to address the series finale in relation to my life as a vet student. Over the past few years, I have struggled with the concept of relationships throughout life. More specifically, it is difficult for me to let close relationships fade or die. My sister and others have indicated that life is full of relationships. Many of them are very important to shaping who you are as a person and/or helping you through a crisis or situation. Unfortunately, most relationships are temporary; some are shorter than we'd like them to be, while others may last a lifetime.

Crazy as it may seem, this episode of Lost may not have answered all of my Lost questions, but it reminded me of a more important concept. This reminder could not have come at a better time. As I begin my final year in vet school, some of my close friends have started graduating and moving on. It has been difficult for me. The long distance relationship with Matt and now my dog has also started bothering me again. The series finale of Lost reminded me to allow relationships to change and end...to let go as I have to. The bright side is to try to remember all of those people who had an impact on who I am, who I have become and who I will become. It is okay to let go. It does not mean anything is wrong with me if relationships fail, it is just a part of life.

Remember and let go.

Another veterinary lesson I have recently experienced is that some times we try to make animals feel better, yet we make them worse. This very sweet Jersey cow (#4453) at the VT dairy had severe diarrhea due to to indigestion. We decided to drench her, but Jersey's hate to be drenched. While my partner and I thought she was swallowing, she ended up spitting out and aspirating most of the drench. We cured her diarrhea, but gave her aspiration pneumonia. Luckily, I saw her today and she is doing much better. I felt solely responsible for making her very ill. I was assured by several DVM's that Jersey's do this, and it's not my fault. Well, it sure felt like my fault. This will happen time and again. While we do our best to make animals better, we will fail. Like Jack Shepard learned we cannot fix everything and sometimes we make it worse unintentionally. Remember, forgive and let go.

In summary, Lost fans do not dwell on what was not revealed over 6 seasons. Take away life lessons and just let it go.

Week 2

2010-05-19T17:19:00.003-04:00

As of my birthday I officially started to like PMM. I absolutely love goats, they are like dog-ruminants. Curious and friendly and not much bigger than me. I am still officially scared of cattle, despite my instructors doing a good job and pushing me and making me feel safe.

I performed my first skin biopsy, have gotten pretty good at hitting the bovine jugular vein, and know a lot about cattle feet and reproduction. It truly is some hard work.

Today, I put in my first set of ear tags and worked the chute catch for the first time. It was a little bumpy, but I made it through. I also palpated my first fetus today, which was very exciting.

In my spare time, I have learned more about my upcoming trip to China and I am resetting my expectations - more on this in another entry to come.

I got to spend my birthday evening with 9 great friends at a fun Mexican restaurant. The margaritas, however, made me ill and as I was finally falling asleep last night some new neighbors underneath my apartment decided 12:30 am was an excellent time to hang pictures on their walls. I had to half asleep remind them of the time. Oh well, there are far worse birthday endings to a great day than that. Being tired is just part of 4th year anyway.

4th Year Begins Bittersweet

2010-05-16T10:15:00.003-04:00

My 11 days of summer started off amazing (see previous post), however it ended on a disappointing note. My trip to New England was to see my nephew Paul, have Matt visit New England for the first time, and see my best friend Petra, currently living in the UK, for her baby shower. Due to residual volcanic ash, Petra's flight from the UK never took off that day and she arrived after we had to depart back to Washington, DC. I really wanted my week off to involve being around people who know me well, appreciate me and understand me as a source of rejuvenation before beginning 4th year, which I am considering a new chapter. Petra was supposed to be a large part of that rejuvenation, and we were both so sad that the opportunity was missed.

Of course the 1 week break was also not as restful as I needed it to be. The townhouse was a construction site, and everyday was packed. One day I did have a wonderful facial, massage and dental cleaning. I drove back to Blacksburg on Mother's Day with my 3 cats, but without Miss Spokane.

In just 1 week of 4th year, I missed her terribly. The reality of why she canot be here, however proved to be true. I had 2 mornings when I had to be up between 4:45 am and 5 am and 1 overnight stay in Jarratt, VA.

The first 2 days of PMM (Farm management) were a little rough around the edges. I was bruised by mishandling of beef cattle in the chute, tired, and covered in poop each day. Wednesday through Friday were a little more fun. We received a pet goat in renal failure who we got to treat more like a companion animal than a production animal. The trip to Jarratt to breed cows via artificial insemination was actually very fun. I learned to thaw semen, and we drove a pick up truck to closely look at the different herds. We rated their body condition and overall health. I also met an adorable bottle-fed calf named Phyllis who will need a home eventually, as she is not "beef material."

On Friday I was on ambulatory with Dr. Becvar. We spent the day hoof trimming at a pretty dairy farm in Dublin, VA. It was hard work, but we were well rewarded with a scenic drive and chocolate milkshakes.

This week I face another overnight trip and some quality time with sheep and the infamous Dr. Pelzer. I think I will get more sleep than last week and compared to some classmates in other rotations, I may just have a great block to start 4th year.

A few close friends graduated this weekend, and as usual I am emotional. I love my community here and it was a glimpse at how hard it will be to leave Blacksburg and say goodbye to a difficult, albeit fun chapter.

Break off to a Terrific Busy Start

2010-05-02T11:01:00.002-04:00

I have only been on "summer break" for 48 hours, and I have been on the go the entire time, but it has been fabulously rejuvenating. Friday evening Matt and I met up with a friend of mine who was my PhD mentor my first summer of vet school for drinks and dinner. We had some great laughs, and we got a chance to celebrate her graduation this spring.

Saturday I completed the Helen challenge at Crossfit for a charity called NRV Cares with a vet school friend (who kicked my butt and won a free 1 month membership). Then Matt and I joined 2 of our friends for the wine festival. We soaked up the sun and some refreshing wines. After that we headed to Roanoke with a different amazing couple for superb Mexican, martinis, and the best jazz concert ever featuring Brad Mehldau and Joshua Redman. It was absolutely amazing.

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/art/blog/2010/04/conversation-brad-mehldau.html

While I need to relax, I also need to be around people that appreciate me for who I am and so far it has been amazing to spend time with great friends. Luckily it's only beginning, as my week of freedom ends by seeing my best friend and my nephew in Boston. As a classmate of mine likes to say, "What could be better?"

Unofficially Official

2010-05-01T09:26:00.003-04:00

Well, it's unofficially official I have finished the classroom portion of veterinary school. It is still hard to believe that I will be wearing a 4th year blue coat or coveralls shortly. I wish we had more than 11 days of break between the semesters, I could use some real down time. My break will be busy. I will be getting my visa to China, seeing some friends and family, and going to Boston for my best friend's baby shower.

I am starting to get a little scared of 4th year, but I know it will be fun once we know what we're doing. My first rotation is PMM production management. It will be farm calls, not my finest subject. I just have to show up with a good attitude, hope I don't get cryptococcus, or stung by a wasp nest in the chute poles and all will be okay I hope.

Today is a jam packed day of fun, not sure if I have the energy for it, but here goes nothing. Charity workout at cross fit called Helen, which is 3 rounds of
400m Run
21 Kettle Bell Swings
12 Pullups

Then a quick shower before the Fork and Cork Blacksburg wine and food festival. Followed up by Alejandro's in Roanoke for dinner and a Brad Mehldau and Joshua Redman jazz concert.

Whew, tomorrow will be a day of rest and organizing my notes for PMM. Fun times.

Remembering

2010-04-25T21:51:00.002-04:00

I remember:

being terrified of the pharmacology midterm and crying from being overwhelmed just before the lab where we learn how to get cows in a chute.

everyone telling me how fast it will go and thinking to myself, "but each day is so long."

jumping out of my seat after 8 hours of lecture to run on the indoor track and clear my head.

studying in the library bridge for 10+ hours straight including meals and vowing to never do that again.

walking up the steps after a long day and anatomy lab, thinking to myself, "what the hell did I do? I left this easy job that paid well, for this stressful, formaldehyde-smelling life that doesn't include Matt."

some point in the middle of 2nd year no longer questioning why I left my finance career behind.

my surgery partner (also a second career student) saying "isn't this so much cooler than sitting at a desk all day?" as I finish closing up my canine castration incision.

thinking I am not smart enough to be here.

all those nights I could not fall asleep despite melatonin, benadryl, excedrin pm...

the feeling of what do I do now after the last final of each semester.

and I am sure to remember so much more over the next year, hopefully those memories will be just a little more positive than the first 2 years.

Hard to Believe

2010-04-23T13:02:00.002-04:00

Well, I made it through the trenches, with one more week and 2 exams remaining in the 3rd year of vet school. The past 2 days we have had some 4th year meetings and our very last lecture in the sanctioned classroom. The transition is feeling real and amazing. While vet school has passed by quickly in retrospective, I feel like a lot has happened in 3 years. When you start that very first day of first year or when you have had it with second year, that blue senior student jacket seems absolutely unattainable. I think we can all attest this week, that while you worked very hard for it, it was attainable all along, by taking school one day at a time.

Everyone asks, "Are you ready?" No, who is and who will be? I am ready to stop sitting on my bum all day watching powerpoints. This time next year I won't be ready to become a doctor, but I'll do it and it will be okay in the end...because if it's not okay, it's not the end yet.

I think the important thing to remember is that there is a steep learning curve. I need to be patient with that learning curve and work at it slowly, day by day, just like the past 3 years. I assume in retrospect, also like the past 3 years, it won't seem so horrible. In Tao they talk about water as being the strongest element of life, not because it is the most forceful but because it is determined and perseveres over time to shape rocks and mountains.

In my opinion, that Tao quote would be the best way to sum up the first 3 years of vet school. And when I have a horrible day on clinics, I must channel what would water do, it would just keep flowing.

Veterinary Experience Antedote

2010-04-19T18:38:00.003-04:00

Well the 2 hardest finals are over. I do not think I did great on the one today, but I do think I passed by some slim margin. It is a relief to have that beast of a class behind me. Less than 2 weeks, 2 more finals and 1 paper to go.

As promised, here is my story about taking Spokane to the vet a few weeks ago:

Spokane was lethargic and not acting right for a few days. She vomited twice and was having some intermittent diarrhea. I had faith that it was simple dietary indiscretion and withheld one of her meals and gave her half of her dinner that evening. The next day she had a mild fever of 103 and didn't want her breakfast at all. I started to worry it could be a systemic infection and thought I should take her in.

First of all, the vet tells me it may not be a real fever, she may just be hot. I explained that I took it twice after she was calm and inside and it's real. He believed the diagnosis to be dietary indiscretion, but worthy of a fecal. He quizzed me on the most obscure parasite on the fecal, which I learned as Giardia, but he said was whipworms. Spokane is on a heartworm preventative that kills whips, and while of course it is possible she could have them, it is less likely the culprit.

The fecal was normal and he thought she was acting fine. I clearly wanted him to do something else since it had been 4 days of lethargy and she was now showing systemic signs. He came back in the room, told me she should be on a dog food for a bigger, more active dog instead of a food for her current weight (she is not underweight) and then offered a subcutaneous injection of penicillin G to "reset her GI flora." He indicated that sometimes this helps get them back on track.

Dr. Leib never mentioned resetting GI flora with penicillin and I was pretty sure that wouldn't kill the possible bacteria that could be causing the problem. He also claimed that dietary indiscretion was just a nice word for food poisoning, which I also didn't recall from GI class.

I went ahead with the shot. I thought to myself, "he thinks it works because in the past the client was happy that the doctor gave them something, but their animal would have gotten better anyway. And of course the next morning Miss Spokane was back to her old crazy self, but no thanks to penicillin G.

Since we have talked a lot about antibiotic usage in clinical pharmacology, I decided to speak to my professor about it. I learned that not only is using penicillin or any antibiotic one time only to reset GI flora not true or useful (you would want the normal flora present to compete with the real "bug"), but a subcutaneous dose would not even reach her GI tract in the first place. We started cracking up. Another professor was there and said that at least I recognized that she was better because she would have improved anyway, not thanks to the good old pen G.

It is hard to be a vet and a pet owner. I understand why the vet did what he did, but he also created more antibiotic resistance and stuck a needle in my needle-averse dog (she takes after her mom). Clients often want a fast fix when there isn't one, but many vets give one anyway if it's not too harmful. It was also hard for me to withold food for the more appropriate 24-48 hours, which would reset the flora, because I was worried (like most owners) that she would be hungry. I also use whether an animal will eat as a sure sign they are feeling better.

It was quite the learning experience. I will face many challenges as vet and these some of the most common are client happiness and compliance. I am glad I recognize the situation as a learning experience and I will be reflecting on how I as a new vet can balance these issues to provide the best care for the animal in the most responsibly way.

Very, very scared

2010-04-18T18:39:00.001-04:00

I am still in the trenches, but I believe tomorrow's surgery final to be the hardest exam ever. It is over 25% cumulative and almost 50% short answer. Usually the cumulative portions of the exams are ~10% and all multiple choice. There is so much information (30 lectures), I am praying I pass. I keep reminding myself that everyone is in the same boat, and I am doing all that I can. I have not had this panic type feeling since second year. I cannot stand this feeling of dread and fear, but the good news is I shouldn't feel this way again until national boards in 7 months.

Here is hoping I make it to 4th year and a better blog post is to follow.

Into the Trenches

2010-04-11T22:17:00.002-04:00

This may be the last post for a while (although I haven't been writing as much as I should be anyway). It's time for the weather to get nice and the exams to start flying at me. My 2 hardest finals are first starting this Thursday with a cumulative urology final and next Monday with a cumulative advanced small animal surgery final...yikes. In between I have some more 5 and 10k races to pursue, that will hopefully keep me sane.

This semester started flying by recently with only 18 more days left of 3rd year. I have only 4 more exams and paper standing between me and 4th year now. While these first 2 exams will be rough, I have found my favorite study location once again this weekend. I have faith that it and 7 more days of perseverance will get me through. As tough as this next week is, it really is not as tough as some other vet school weeks have been in the past. Is this because I have been through the trenches before, an finally after doing it so many times know there is a light at the end of the tunnel? Or is it that 3rd year just isn't as rough around the edges as second year?

Despite all of the hard work ahead and confusion of whether I am smart enough or remember enough to be a 4th year, I have been enjoying the beautiful weather with Matt and our dog. She has really turned a corner in terms of maturity and our bond is growing each day. She truly is amazing...when she listens.

I have quite the funny vet experience to share on my next entry. This time I was the paying customer and the vet did everything they tell us not to do in school, yet I understood why he did it.

Stay tuned and I'll return with the anecdote when I dig myself out of the trenches in just over a week.

27 more days and other ramblings

2010-04-03T17:10:00.007-04:00

When I think back to first year, it feels like a long long time ago, yet it went by very fast. I remember thinking, will I really wear a blue jacket and be a 4th year? It seemed impossible, and in fact the next few weeks will be tough, but I can almost count on 1 hand how many more exams I have to endure until I start clinics. That is crazy. I am excited and ready. I am not excited for giving up my free time, especially as I grow to love the New River Valley more each day, as I experience it with Spokane.

The past 2 weekends have been amazing. Last weekend I placed 3rd in my age group in a 5.25 mile trail race and had the time of my life running it. This weekend Matt, Spokane and I had a great day blazing new hiking trails and trying an amazing local restaurant. I am glad I have made every effort to make Blacksburg my home and to embrace it, as opposed to allowing vet school to gobble me whole.

Life has hit us with some stumbling blocks these past few years, but suddenly I feel as if things are changing in a positive way. Not that anything was ever horrible, but perhaps we are learning to make lemonade out of lemons. Simple to say, much harder to practice. Am I finally learning how to be patient and slowly work toward an important goal? I certainly hope I can continue learning how to adapt, I think it will benefit me for the next 12 months.

On another note, I am starting to feel as if vet school has changed me since I started only 2 and half years ago. I can't put my finger on how I have changed, but I definitely feel like I am growing and changing. I felt this way before when I changed between 21 and 23 and again between 25 and 26. It's a strange feeling that may be coming because a transition is just over a month away, but nonetheless recently something feels different than it did 2 and half years ago. When I can identify what that difference is I will be happy to share it.

Another Spring Break Bites the Dust

2010-03-14T22:43:00.005-04:00

Spring break was hectic and a bit of a calamity, but fun nonetheless. I am glad Matt pushed us to go to Jackson Hole. It was beautiful, with relatively warm temperatures and great to get back in touch with nature. Skiing was an absolute thrill for me. After 1 full day lesson, I was back to a beginner-intermediate level after a rough start in the morning (my nerves were taking over). I fell in love with skiing all over again and really hope I can go more than once every 8 years. Matt on the other hand tried snowboarding, which I thought was safer than his nostalgic skateboarding. I was proven wrong. Poor guy was doing great, until he fell and fractured both wrists. My plan was for him to love snowboarding so we could go ski/snowboard at least once a year. It sort of backfired. He may try again, he may not. Word of advice: Wear wrist guards until you learn how to fall properly.

I saw some family and friends, didn't get enough work done, and managed to get a fair amount of sleep. We selected new floors for the house, and hopefully the construction will start shortly. I missed my pets very much, but they are all doing fine and I have 2 of 4 with me in Blacksburg this week.

I really needed to clean out the house and closets for charity and organizational purposes, which I had no time to do. While I want to go on a camping trip during my week off between 3rd and 4th years, I may have to sacrifice or come up with some plan to get the cleaning done with time to relax. I still owe myself a day of nothing but tv and relaxing.

Only 8 more weeks of 3rd year remain and less than 100 days until I leave for China. I am vaccinated and only missing a VISA and a plane ticket. Exams are spread out until the end of April. For now it's time to sit back, finish as strong as possible and enjoy my freedom of classes...never thought I would say that one, but also never thought I'd actually wear a blue jacket.

Almost to Spring Break

2010-02-28T17:48:00.004-05:00

Less than 1 week and 2 exams stand between me and spring break. Both exams mark the final exam for 2 classes, and 2 steps closer to the end of 3rd year. Last weekend, the weather was temporarily warm and Matt and Spokane and I played outside. It felt rejuvenating. This past week I spent very little time in the classroom. I was productive in catching up on some lectures and preparing for my exams this coming week.

I also organized my last Pfizer event as a student representative. Somehow I pulled off a spectacular pain management wetlab Friday evening. Everyone who attended seems to have greatly enjoyed the lab, and I was happy to have my last event be more than just another lunch time meeting. For those of you readers not in vet school yet, you will know what I mean soon enough.

I did a little more planning for my elective externship block in China. I received $1500 toward my trip from the school and purchased additional health and evacuation insurance. I plan to purchase my plane ticket over spring break and my VISA in early May.

All in all things are coming together. Matt and I picked out some new floors to repair the house that I absolutely love, and our trip to the Grand Tetons is one week away. I found someone to watch the pup while we are away and should get to some friends and family albeit briefly when we return to DC.

Here's hoping the hemolymphatic final exam goes as well as the midterm and I can pull off a passing grade for my pass fail advanced imaging elective, which I have not even started studying for just yet.

After spring break, we will only have 6 weeks of classes left. Exiting. More importantly I hope warmer weather awaits.

3rd Year Winter Blues, Spring Break in Sight.

2010-02-18T21:35:00.002-05:00

Well 4 exams behind me and no more exams for 2 weeks. It feels relaxing. The long days of sitting in class are also behind me, thankfully. So far so good this semester, but vet school is losing its' novelty. I know what I need to do and how to do it, but I am ready for the challenge of the clinic. Despite my blah attitude, I decided I should just sit back and enjoy the last semester in the classroom, where I have time off during the day and my own flexible schedule. The weather, however, is not cooperating. With the snow still piled high and arctic temperatures 20 degrees below normal its hard to enjoy my time.

I hope for winter to pass and a lovely spring to replace it. Spring break in 2 weeks off to the Grand Tetons. Hopefully it will be relaxing, fun and not too cold. In the meantime we have been challenged with sever water damage to the house due to ice and snow in our gutters, Spokane having no temperature too cold for her, and crossfit workouts.

As always I am keeping busy despite the wind trying to blow me over.

Back to the Grind -Choose Happy

2010-01-31T19:40:00.003-05:00

The 4th week of my last classroom semester begins tomorrow with an exam and ends with another exam Friday. This week it is officially back to the grind.

I have not written about this semester yet, because I have been confused and unexcited. My patience for powerpoint presentations, tests, and immature/unprofessional classmates coupled with 1 day a week in the clinic has made me yearn for the clinic more than ever. Yes it is scary and yes I know I do not know everything, but I am ready to stop learning by memorizing and start learning by doing. My motivation this semester has waned. I have had moments this semester when I am studying and going through the motions I have done so many times before and I feel like a parody of myself; highlighting, underlining, writing out notes and charts. I have done this all before for 2.5 years and I am ready for a change. I suppose the novelty of vet school and learning all you can learn as fast as possible has worn off and I want to start learning how to put it all into practice and learn how to do the job I signed up to do. I am also over not living with my husband regularly. In fewer words I am done...but I am not. I have 13 more weeks of parodying myself in order to reach 4th year where we cooperate and graduate!

I have many exciting plans for 4th year, and as of this weekend for spring break. Matt and I will be exploring the Grand Tetons in Jackson Hole, WY. I am just ready to reach some of these exciting experiences.

I suppose I should just sit back and enjoy this semester. I dropped all but 1 elective because I wanted more free time. I should use it to work on my patience, my friendships and saying goodbye to the classroom, even if it is slower than I would like. There is no point in rushing my life away, even if something better is on the other side. As Dr. Rick Debowes of Veterinary Leadership Program says, choose happy. That is what I must do.

Back to School Blues

2010-01-08T16:40:00.004-05:00

With arctic temperatures abound in the US, it is hard to get excited about going back to an even colder land. (Blacksburg tends to be 5-10 degrees cooler than Washington, D.C.)

I can't honestly say my break was relaxing, but I did accomplish some important tasks. I worked 7 shifts, possibly for the last time as a technician at the Hope Center. I visited 4 other animal hospitals and have definitively decided to do a private practice small animal internship. I worked on funding requests for my externship to China this summer. My mom came to visit from NY and meet the granddog. I did some shopping, got a little sleep (not enough). I cleaned many bathrooms and vacuumed much pet hair. I also got in a little workout time (again, not enough). Consideringmy break is shorter than the rest of the school because I am a third year vet student, it was a veyr prolific break.

The most interesting turn of events, however, was the unexpected purchase of a new car. In our original plan, we had hoped Matt's 1997 Acura would last a year or two after I finish school. Never in our wildest dreams did we prepare for my 2006 Honda Accord to have transmission failure at the tender age of 6 years 80,000 miles. It was a shocker. The next thing I knew, we were sending my NY Yankee to the used car lot and trading it in for a 2010 Honda Insight Hybrid. I didn't have time to mourn, and we barely had time to triple check our decision. We knew of a minimum of $6,000 in repairs on my car alone in the next year and the x factor of additional repairs was very scary. I also was taught when the transmission goes, the car should go. C'est la vie.

The Insight is very fun to drive, easy to park, and more ecofriendly. It has many cute features, but some of the more luxury features of my old car are missing, such as the sun roof, seat warmers, steering wheel radio controls, 6 disc cd changer, powerful V6 engine...etc. I am still getting a little teary-eyed as I write this, but I was proud of our negotiation skills with the car salesman and deep down I know that everything happens for a reason.

I am very grateful I survived the trip back to DC, as apparently the car was very unsafe to drive.

Cheers to the last semester sitting in the classroom!

Winter Has Arrived.

2009-12-23T16:05:00.002-05:00

So finals finally ended. They were long and somewhat painful, but another semester is done and it feels terrific. A snowstorm slammed the DC and Southwest VA area with 2+ feet of snow, making the trip home a little longer than usual.

Once exams ended I splurged on a massage and took a nap. I have cleaned my apartment in Blacksburg and our town house in Northern VA. I am finished with cleaning for a while. I was late with the holiday cards, but they went out nonetheless.

Yesterday I started my internship search by visiting Friendship Hospital in Washington, DC. They have a great intern program and I was impressed by the amount of doctors (22) and the elective week and dental rotations their program has. Since I have only worked at 2 hospitals, it was interesting to see how other hospitals are run and staffed. I was slightly overwhelmed by the amount of work I will be doing as an intern and the 5 days off per year...ouch. The schedule mentoring sessions and rounds made it clear to me that they do value training their interns, and I believe my clinical skills would hugely benefit from a year there. I just need to decide of my marriage and my body can take such a tough year.

Life of a veterinary student= always more to think about.

I will be visiting 3 other hospitals and working 6 shifts at the Hope Center over break. It will be nice to get back into the clinic and visiting the hospitals is very helpful, but both mean not a lot of free time.

Life of a veterinary student= not a lot of free time, even on a break.

I also want to wish all my followers a very Happy Holiday and a Successful 2010.

Finals Have Begun- Let the Good Times Roll

2009-12-08T13:03:00.003-05:00

As usual I am in a constant state of finals depression. All I want to do is study and watch tv, maybe read some productive and non-productive material. Instead all I am allowed to do is study. To keep my sanity I work out the bare minimum hour a day, and to keep the dog sane, I walk her or send her off to daycare.

Our first exam was GI yesterday and while it went well somehow, I was delirious taking the exam. I studied all weekend, felt like I knew nothing, and semi-panicked during the exam over one case I couldn't figure out. It lasted 2 hours and 40 minutes. Now I am mentally exhausted, but am forced to push through it for 4 more exams.

One day I will figure out why finals are so horrible. They weren't in undergrad. We don't have any classes to hinder our study time, so what is so bad? Is it that we're at the end and exhausted? Could it be the word "cumulative"? Is it the weight bearing down on us that all we have to do is study? I don't know, but finals exhaust and depress me.

Here's to December 17th!

Another Break Bites the Dust

2009-11-29T17:25:00.003-05:00

Sadly, it is the last day of Thanksgiving break. I shopped a little, saw some good girlfriends and family. Ran trails and did some yoga, studied a touch, and lounged a touch. While I could use another week, I am slightly rejuvenated to get back to the grind for just under 3 more weeks. Finals will be hard and as they approach I am getting a little queasy. Compared to the last 3 weeks, however, they should be the same or slightly less stressful since classes won't be getting in the way and thankfully the exams are spread out over 2 weeks.

It will be hard not to focus on my busy winter break. I will going to a wedding, cleaning the house, shopping, visiting veterinary hospitals with small animal internships, entertaining my mom for a week, working 6-7 shifts at the Hope Center emergency clinic, and finishing up the dental modules I signed up for (I only completed 2 of 10 over this break).

Here's to 3 more weeks of the second to last semester of sitting on my butt in class. It's time to push just a little harder.

Made it to Thanksgiving Break!

2009-11-21T17:48:00.004-05:00

The 3 weeks of intense examinations finally came to a screeching, exhausting halt on Thursday. For the most part all the exams went well, sacrificing sleep along the way. The night before the neuro exam I stayed up until 1 am studying, the latest I have had to stay up since vet school. It was a true cramming session, but in the end it worked out and I took a nap and watched some tv after the exam.

I am still decompressing and trying to get a few good nights of sleep to become normal again. The past 2 weeks reminded me more of finals than third year, but we have 2+ weeks of reprieve before our hardest final hits, gastroenterology. It is nice that it will be first and we can get it behind us.

Now I have a 8 more days to relax, recoup, cook, eat, train dog, and try to catch up for finals amid other errands and doctor's appointments. Only 3 weeks stand between me and winter break and having 1 more classroom semester to go before clinics.

Happy Thanksgiving bloggers!

Rough Week Ahead, but Making Headway

2009-11-08T21:33:00.002-05:00

This week has 2 written exams and the surgery practical final exam in store. While I did not get to play very much this weekend, I did get a lot of work accomplished in order to not fall too behind in my other classes.

I did get to play with Matt and Spokane in the beautiful weather on Saturday. Spokane played with some new dogs running, wrestling and chasing in and out of water. She had fun and got dirty! I have certainly seen some maturity with her in the past 2 weeks, and I am a proud mom.

Next weekend will not be very much fun either, with a gastro exam on large animal diseases and the liver, but I can now taste Thanksgiving break (and to some extent the end of the semester) and it is going to be great!

Here's to studying hard for 11 more days.

Way to Regress Michelle

2009-11-01T18:46:00.002-05:00

The more I look at the next 3 weeks of my life, the more depressed I become. Test after test, surgery after surgery. Today I got a pit in the bottom of my stomach I hadn't had in a long time. It felt like the old "can I do this, why must we live apart?, make it stop" feeling.

Matt is taking Spokane during the week the next 2 weeks, so I can study more efficiently and because I have a lot of surgery days where I cannot come home for lunch. I also get at least an extra hour of sleep not having to walk her in the morning. Starting to separate the family again, however, makes me super sad and I am really going to miss her. I hope she will be good through this transition and not drive Matt crazy. He has really started to get attached to her, but I am sure a few horrendous weeks could change that.

He misses his cat buddies, I miss him, and I am just getting tired of the situation again. I also suppose all this emotion could be hormonal or just what it feels like to enter week 11 of the fall semester. I'll go back to the motto of one day at a time that got me through last year. I will focus on my studies and hopefully make it through, even if I am not happy again until November 20. That's only 19 days away right?

On a happier note, Spokane graduated from her second obedience class Saturday. She has a ways to go, but she has made great strides in 3 months. I am proud of her, and I really love her dearly.

A Repeat of Second Year for a Month

2009-10-25T21:08:00.002-04:00

Today was my last day to play outside and take the weekend leisurely. Fortunately, the fall foliage has peaked and winter is on its way. Unfortunately, my stress and flashbacks of last year and the impossible hurdles of vet school are back. This week I have a neuro exam and man is this stuff tough. To top it off I don't remember those cranial nerves and muscle innervations as well as I thought I did. Time to break out the flashcards. Next week I have surgery and 2 more exams, and 2 exams per week until Thanksgiving.

Deep down I know it is possible, but it will require another level of focus I haven't had most of the semester. I have not had it because I didn't need it. I have been having enough time to stay on top of things, but not anymore. Luckily it should go by quickly, and here's hoping for success. It was nice to have some pressure off, back to the real vet school I suppose.

On another note, Spokane has been doing well. She has amazing moments of listening, coupled with bouts of being stubborn. She knows her commands, but now chooses when to do them. We have started some off-leash fetching and training, which is exciting. She still has her bad days and way too much energy, especially when it is cold, but she is an amazing dog. I am sure I won't always be thinking that as I embark on a rough few weeks, but in the long run I think we are both happy to have her.

As usual this time of the semester I am tired and starting to get sick of school. I desire to be a 4th year, or better yet be working and living my life again. I will persevere and hopefully make it turkey, holidays and one last academic semester.

Mid Semester Blues

2009-10-17T21:33:00.004-04:00

While 3rd year is worlds away better and more manageable than second year, we are all getting tired and the novelty of clinical relevance is starting to wear out. I once again long for more free time and mindless activity. I will admit the semester is going by very quickly and with 8 weeks under my belt, and only 4 weeks left of classes it is a downhill slope. That slope is of course filled with multiple choice tests, hours of studying and sitting, and the intimidating surgery practical final exam.

But the light at the end of the tunnel involves Thanksgiving break.

On a positive note, I have basically worked out my senior schedule and I will be going to the Chengdu Panda Reserve in China, Humane Society lobbying group in Washington DC and the wildlife center of VA as my elective blocks. Pretty exciting. It really does feel like I will be a 4th year, which seemed absolutely impossible just 2 years ago.

The trickier part of registration is figuring out what classes I don't want to take next semester. They seemed to have saved all the fun electives for the spring, but lecture burn out is definitely starting to seep in. I plan to register for a bunch and drop once the semester starts and I evaluate how burned out I am after 5 semesters of vet school.

To the downhill crunch of the Fall Semester!

End of Week 6

2009-10-02T16:57:00.002-04:00

This week felt long. It was filled with lots of useful information for preparing for my first job out of school, but that information came with strings attached. It was very intimidating that in a year I will have to start looking for a job and decide for certain whether I want to do an internship or find a practice with good mentorship to start my career. I also thought I had my resume in pretty decent shape, but there are many more changes to make. The idea of negotiating a contract is intimidating. My one experience negotiating a job offer didn't go very well, and I don't know if I will have time to read the recommended book Getting Past No. While graduation and 4th year seem much more real now than they ever did last year, the career development class changed my excitement to stress about when I will have time to do all the leg work to make the right decision and study for boards.

Endoscopy lab was good, I went last in my group and made a few attempts at the pylorus, unsuccessfully. The rest of the endoscopy went pretty well, including intubation and anesthesia.

It seems like the heavier weeks of the semester will be coming late this month until Thanksgiving, but it is nice to enjoy a lighter load while we can. Third year is still my favorite so far, but the prospects of 4th year and after are starting t be intimidating. I know how much time interviewing for jobs required my senior year of college and in many ways these are bigger decisions with less free time to make them. I have also been feeling like I really could use a mentor with varied experience and some good advice on internship vs. first job and I haven't found that yet. The people I have connected with are very busy veterinarians that I have not been able to spend much time with. They just don't know me that well. I hope I find that answer or mentor within the next year.

College Days Remembered

2009-09-25T22:05:00.002-04:00

Very rarely has vet school reminded me of undergrad. This week after Wednesday's public health exam, however, has had minimal classes for my track and no exams for a while. I have been able to spend time outside playing with Spokane and trail running again.

Thursday evening I volunteered for the pet loss hotline and it was a very rewarding experience. I spoke to a woman who lost her favorite dog to a number of severe diseases a month ago. Since I am taking a communications course this semester and we recently discussed euthanasia and client grief I was anxious to try be a good listener and help this grieving owner. Our conversation went very well. The woman opened up to me and ended by telling me I truly helped her and she appreciated my help and the many veterinarians she has met. She really valued the medical care we provide for animals and noted what I had known for a while, that in many ways veterinary care exceeds human care in terms of veterinary-client compassion. It gave me confidence that I will make a good vet one day, especially since on average 8 pets per month are euthanized per veterinarian.

This week was much lighter than the prior week, but still fun, fulfilling, and challenging.

A Tough, Successful, Rewarding Week!

2009-09-20T09:43:00.002-04:00

While this week lacked some sleep and some workout time, such sacrifices are sometimes worth it. Both exams went well, way better than expected. This means one of two things. One there is a little man in the scantron machine that helps me out or that studying in advance over time with other people is very effective.

Surgery went pretty well and was as fun and exciting as it had been on RAVS this summer. I spayed a 6 pound Chihuahua named Trixie with some nasty periodontal disease (grade 3 or 4 perhaps). On my second pedicle as I was breaking it down the suspensory ligament popped and there went the pedicle. I knew what happened right away, and knew the steps to fix it. My teacher came over I told her what to do to fix it and it went well. It is bound to happen in practice with these smaller dogs and was a great learning experience to have it happen in this safe environment, when someone is there to help. It happened to a lot of the other students with small dogs as well. The only other thing that went wrong was that I started closing the body wall incorrectly using muscle instead of the external rectus sheath, but they said we would do that and I have something important to work toward next time. My skin and subcutaneous sutures went well and Trixie went home the next day with only mild swelling.

At the end of that long day I had to study for a big GI exam, and while I was exhausted I kept thinking to myself, "Someone is going to pay me to do this...amazing." I also got a taste of what 4th year will be like working with the technicians and clinicians as a team to provide the best care for the animal. I cannot wait for fourth year.

In summary, once again the impossible was possible and tremendously rewarding. They weren't kidding when they said third year is a lot of fun. It truly is!

As for the menagerie, Spokane went to doggie day care twice this week and on only her 5th visit she initiated play properly on her own. Each day I come home to my 3 cats and dog and appreciate how amazing each one of them is. Of course when Matt is there it is only more fulfilling.

To my few fans and readers out there I can only say keep plugging away! If this is the career you want you have to work for it but it truly will be worth it!

The Make or Break Week Cometh

2009-09-11T19:11:00.002-04:00

With 3 weeks of 3rd year under my belt it is safe to say that "they" were right...it does get better. I absolutely love the classes and the labs. It all feels relevant and is slowly (very slowly) coming together, even if that involves looking stuff up again and again and saying to yourself, "at some point I knew that."

With that in mind, most of the semester looks extremely manageable, even with a new
puppy with the exception of next week.

Monday: Small animal advanced techniques lab and double quiz.
Tuesday: Surgery midterm exam...hard and includes Monday's lecture (talk about last minute).
Thursday: I am surgeon for a spay surgery on a client-owned animal. This involves a physical exam the evening prior, later that evening removing food, early am exam the day of surgery and checking on my patient later the evening of surgery. Add a dog into that mix and add

Friday: Gastroenterology exam...very hard. To top it off material we go over on Thursday is on the test.

Then I have class the entire day Friday until 4pm...extra dagger.

On the bright side, as I mentioned this is by far one of the toughest weeks and if I survive I can take deep breaths and enjoy the rest of the semester for the most part.

In the past weeks that seemed impossible were conquered, so I hope this is one of those weeks.

First 2 Weeks of 3rd Year Under the Belt

2009-09-03T15:19:00.002-04:00

Having passed my surgical pretest today, I think it is safe to say that third year is amazing. Everything is clinical and relevant and my do I think my summer prepared me for the fall. I am one of the few not nervous about surgery. (me not nervous in vet school, what is going on?) A friend of mine and I brainstormed and started realizing well, we have done 2 years, we know what need to get done, how to do it, and that it will happen. You don't come this far to let it slip away. We are also in lecture less and laboratory more, which is terrific.

I definitely have forgotten a lot of the info over the past 2 years, but I have to remember that it takes more than 2 years to be a great doctor and there is nothing wrong with looking things up, as long as the correct binder or text book is within reach.

The menagerie or Larsen zoo is doing well. The cats have their domain and the dog has hers. 2 of our cats may venture into her domain now and then, and sometimes Spokane chases and sometimes she calmly acknowledges and ignores. While coming home for lunch everyday is not as efficient, it's also not too bad, and other than on surgery days seems like it will work out fine.

A couple weeks from now is a rough week. We have 2 big exams and its the first week of surgery labs. Right now that is the major hurdle. Once I get through that, if successful, the rest of the semester should cruise on by.

Recap of a Busy Summer

2009-08-18T17:27:00.002-04:00

Over the past couple days in between long hot dog walks, appointments and packing I have been reflecting on my last summer as a vet student. It absolutely flew right past me. I did not get to hang out with friends as much as I had liked to, but unfortunately that's part of life as people spend more time with their significant other and job and summer vacation plans.

In terms of veterinary experience, I feel well-rounded, but my brain feels rusty. I wish I had time to review some anatomy and pharmacology, but don't we always have that wish, yet somehow it never comes to fruition.

I feel confident with my clinical skills and look forward to surgery class this fall, after performing numerous spays and neuters and mice vasectomies.

In terms of quality time with the hubby, well is there ever enough time? While work consumed me during June and beginning of July, I found my balance between the gym, Matt and work and it started to feel very nice. We had a month where we biked every weekend, which was great. We jogged around monuments and tested outdoor trail courses in our area. Our trip to the Outer Banks was a true highlight and one I hope we take again sometime.

It has been over the last week, however, that I really can look back at this summer and smile at how much I accomplished and managed to have some fun sandwiched in between.

I am anxious to return to school with my large obligation, my new dog Spokane, and how she + 3 cats will fit into my vet school life. She seems to need a minimum of 2 long walks per day and she can still get puppy crazy. On the other hand I am taking the least amount of credits this semester and some of the classes are very little work/pressure.

As I was packing my closet today, that old feeling came back. The feeling that our life up here is so rich and complete (more complete than ever with dog) and how I do not want to give that up or be without Matt again. While I haven't been the best wife this summer in terms of cooking and cleaning he continues to be supportive of all my daily trials and tribulations. I will miss having him during the week and can only hope I adjust to it a lot quicker this time.

I am also ready to get on with it, put pieces together and get to 4th year. I hope I can make it through this fall semester sanely and successfully.

A Fulfilling Experience Afterall

2009-08-06T14:18:00.002-04:00

Today was the long-awaited NIH Summer Student Poster Day. While I would probably rather be back in on the coast in Washington state working on my clinical techniques some more with the RAVS group, today's poster session went pretty well.

Last summer only 2-3 people came to talk to me about my poster and most of the time I stood there bored or chatting with my neighbors. My poster didn't have cool photos or much direct clinical veterinary relevance compared to some others.

This year, while I was forced to exclude many pictures and incorporate a lot more words than I would have liked to, I got the chance to speak to a lot more people than last year. Some were friends or family, which is always comforting, and others were students who were curious and walking by. The most fulfilling experience was speaking with National Cancer Institute and other principal NIH investigators on analgesia in post-op mice. Many of them were shocked that bupivicaine at the time of surgery was the only pain relief given and were eager to include post-op analgesics in their future studies.

Speaker with researchers, who have budget constraints and can sometimes be insensitive to animal pain, felt very rewarding. While I only spoke to around 10 people, the issue was raised with direct stakeholders, who can help change the standard of analgesia in mice models and lab animal medicine.

While some better results would have been great and less time watching mice all summer more fun, it was amazing to know I made a small difference in lab animal welfare that could be a small step toward better pain management in mice.

In summary, all hard work is usually not without purpose.

Puppy Update: Spokane's second training session on Tuesday went well. She impressed me and made me proud except for 5 minutes after the UPS man knocked on the door. Yesterday, however, she was extremely mouthy to me and Matt. It also seems that each day it is harder to get her into the crate. This morning she thought it was a game and wanted us to chase her. We continue to give her praise, treats, special toys and bones while she's in there, but luring her in is quite the challenge. Once she is inside she lays down and chews on her bones/toys. We have been spending more time with her in the crate as well, not only leaving each time.

It may take more time for her to like it or she might not be a "crate dog", in which case hopefully she becomes trust worthy sooner rather than later.

In the meantime were working on down, her name, leash walking, and come.

RAVS Recap

2009-08-02T21:22:00.002-04:00

Well I am back from Washington state and I would highly recommend this experience to all vet students. It was more hands on and more intense than most of the training we get in school. I did in fact pass my surgery exam and lucked out with 2 surgery days (many only get 1 day). I started trying to find my way through many a physical exam, had some varied anesthesia cases, and performed 10-11 spays/neuters on dosg and cats. I also saw a limb amputation and helped that dog, who was hit by a car 3 weeks prior recover miraculously.

The days were draining though and at times I wondered how I would get it through it. The reservation was in a beautiful area with mountains, lakes, Coulee Dam (quite a site) and pine trees everywhere.

It was fun to get advice and help from the doctors that were there. I have to say I absolutely loved surgery.

On a surprising note, I brought home a living souvenir. Her name is Spokane (it was Apache) and she was one of the Reservation's Animal Control Officer's dogs who only had a few more days before she would be euthanized if no one adopted her. Another girl on the trip and myself really took a liking to her and did not want to see that happen. Nether one of us was quite ready for a dog, but in what was my most spontaneous decision possibly ever, I got her on my flight and now I have a crash course in dog training 101. She is a lot of work for me and Matt, but for only 2 days she is doing really well. Although I wish she liked the crate more.

I hope I made the right decision and that she can be trained asap! I am very nervous about having her and the 3 cats during school, but hopefully I can make it work.

Murphy's Law and Summer of Learning

2009-07-20T15:29:00.003-04:00

After a semi-relaxing weekend and some quality time with Matt, Monday started off with Murphy's law in full effect. What was supposed to be the last day of my experiment and arising at 5:00 am turned into a disaster. After 4 of the 9 mice were completed, the power in our procedure room went off and we could not complete the surgeries with enough time for me to start the 1 hour post-op observation. So 4 mice wasted and another day of arising before the sun, and I am tired today. On top of that, we were already under the gun time-wise for my poster, and now it's even more exacerbated unless I use 4 instead of 5 data sets. Ugh.

With 4 days left until I take off for Spokane and RAVS I am excited. I have been practicing for my surgery practical and feel ready. I really hope I get to perform some spays and neuters this week, but I am sure it will be a great experience even if I do not.

This Saturday at the emergency clinic was one of my favorites. I placed a urinary catheter in a dog successfully on the first try, placed 4 IV catheters, and completed my first blood transfusion. It was very rewarding and really solidified for me that my heart lies in small animal medicine, at least in the near term. For reasons to be elaborated on later, I no longer feel a calling to laboratory animal medicine, but I am glad I got the chance to explore both simultaneously this summer.

A Most Exhilerating Experience

2009-07-12T21:11:00.003-04:00

First off, I want to address the difficulty I have had with my age since I turned 30 a month and a half ago. My best friend turned 30 this week and after talking to her I had an epiphany I would like to share.

Perhaps the 20's are about finding out who you are as a person. Things you like or dislike, your values, interests, goals, and career exploration. As I enter my 30's I feel confident in knowing these aspects about myself. While there is a lifetime of learning that remains, perhaps this decade is about enjoying life in your own skin, now that you know what that skin is made of. Just a thought to ease the transition.

The main focus of this blog entry, however, is not a reason why 30 could be better than 20 (who am I kidding), but about a day that will live in infamy. My first rock climbing experience was one of the most demanding, powerful and rewarding experiences I have ever had in my life. Not only was it much more physically demanding than I imagined, or experienced with indoor climbing, but the mental puzzle as you calculate the next move was unexpected, but amazing.

At no point did I feel unsafe. The sport challenges each individuals boundaries and you choose to go on or stop. Whether you reach the anchor or not, a sense of accomplishment is inevitable and the physical challenge unbelievable.

As an avid gym rat and hiker for 7+ years, it has been a while since I have been challenged on this level and felt so alive! While I had always plan to sky dive when I turned 30, I think rock climbing on many levels may have been the more exhilarating choice.

I look forward to getting back out on the rock as soon as my body recovers and in the process learning more about my limitations and the amazing things my mind and body is capable of.

Middle Ground Found

2009-07-07T19:01:00.003-04:00

After true burnout of myself and the other lab vet I am working with, we both pushed back to our manager and he responded. Things are much better. The study is now manageable for the time frame we have. I was able to attend an influenza vaccine talk today during lunch. I will be spending more time with the primates on an enrichment level, reading more articles, and getting a better feel for lab medicine and not just the summer project.

After the OBX and the long 4th weekend (we camped again this time at lake Anna with some friends), I feel rejuvenated. I am avidly practicing for my RAVS surgery practical, which is going to be tough, but practicing suture techniques is only going to put me ahead, even if I don't pass the test.

While I am depressed that summer is half over, I have been able to go to the gym and have a small social life between 2 jobs now and things feel much better.

Last night I went to a great pilates class, followed with Zumba, which was more like salsa. I loved it! It strengthened my desire to learn how to salsa. I need to add that to the next 30 years list. I made the list before my 30th birthday to keep track of all I want to accomplish in my next 30 years. Matt and I also really want a boat and sooner rather than later. Perhaps in the next decade?

I also decided on Monday that I am very glad I am spending some time at the emergency clinic and time in lab medicine. It makes for good comparisons.

As for my current career plans, I think I want to practice in small animal medicine for 3-5 years and go from there. I can always switch but it makes for a solid foundation.

Mid-Summer Evaluation

2009-06-28T17:44:00.003-04:00

I am still struggling with balancing my life with my NIH position. The pilot study has gotten underway and I find I have not time to even enter and evaluate the data. I feel like I race around the NIH campus just to make a meeting or to store samples, etc. While it is a good experience and a resume booster, it is not enough time learning about what a lab animal vet does and too much time watching mice behaviors and pressing on their rear for fecal samples. I don't see how my poster will be done in a month either since my sponsor is on vacation for most of July.

Meanwhile my Saturday shift at the Hope Center has been very rewarding. I intubated my first cats last night (it is much harder than a dog), got some catheters in and really felt like I made a difference. One of the new doctors is a senior from VT that just graduated in May and it was funny how I helped him with a blocked cat. It made me feel more at ease that starting out is a challenge for all vets and perhaps I have some advantage because of my experience at the Hope Center.

Matt and I went to the Outer Backs and VA Beach last weekend and it was absolutely beautiful. Many wildlife refuges, lovely beaches, great seafood and not enough time to see it all. I would have loved a whole week there and we are toying with the idea of returning at the end of the summer.

In my not so spare time I am trying to have a social life and work on my resume and externship ideas. I saw a wonderful ballet with my sister Thursday night at the Kennedy Center. Matt and I went to Artomatic in DC Friday night and got inspired by all the wonderful artists and photographers in the area.

It just stinks that I have less time and less sleep than I really would have liked my last summer before graduation. Hindsight is 20/20, but part of me wishes I just worked at the Hope Center all summer, instead.

Lab Animal Medicine Realities

2009-06-15T20:40:00.002-04:00

While I was in love with my position at NCI-NIH in Lab Animal Services, it has taken a slight detour away from the clinical side toward another deadline intense, time-draining summer research project. While I think the project is important for the welfare of laboratory mice used in surgical research, by looking at different analgesics and different doses through corticosteroid levels and behaviors, spending my entire summer locked in a basement for 8-10 hours a day watching mice behaviors is not going to give me the idea of a career in lab animal medicine.

The opportunities, speakers, meetings at NIH are amazing opportunities. I strongly fear that because of this study I will be unable to participate in them. Today I attended the first of 4 journal club meetings having to do with teaching how to critically read a scientific article and current MRI research. I hope I can attend the next 3 as well, just one of the many opportunities for summer students that I may miss out on.

The first 2 weeks of my internship I shadowed a lab animal vet on his animal rounds, sat in on an IACUC meeting and spent some time learning clinical primate techniques and standards of protocol. Now I may not have those opportunities again.

When I started this summer I was asked about my goals and what I wanted out of this summer. While I voiced my opinion and the first few weeks were perfect, this week we (pretty much just I) start the pilot study, which will take up almost all day Tuesday and Thursday. Next week it could take up the same amount of time, and if the pilot study is successful we will be doing 10-15 animals per day, all of which require behavior watches at 1, 3, 5, 7 hours post-Sx.

While I understand the importance of the study and the impact it can have on lab animal medicine if it is successful (no similar data is available for mice), the time pressure of summer research is frustrating. As my last summer before I graduate, I really need to explore as many options in veterinary medicine as I can. Only watching mice for painful behaviors is not going to help guide my career ambitions.

I hope after the next 4 weeks, a middle ground is found.

In the meantime, Matt and I have been biking and hiking and having leisurely weekends with great weather. I am glad I decided to work at the Hope Center on Saturdays, even though it makes for a 6-day work week.

This weekend we head south to Richmond, VA beach and the OBX for some camping, driving and R&R.

Early Start to the Week

2009-06-08T13:15:00.002-04:00

This morning I awoke at 5:15 am to get to the primate facility by 7. I was planning to rebel and drink my tea on the metro,, but somewhere between my car and the train my thermos disappeared. I was devastated and very tired, but I made it on time to practice some physical exams on the sedated macaques.

After that I headed back to the office to do some safety and emergency preparedness required reading and try to plan the rest of the week.

I did have time to take aerobics class during lunch which woke me up and will save time later.

I spent the afternoon shaving mice to save time when we practice our vasectomy surgerical technique for the last time before the pilot study tomorrow.

Major Mishap

2009-06-07T19:24:00.003-04:00

I was warned by all 3 anesthesia instructors, "You will make this mistake." After 3 successful intubations in class, I honestly thought I wouldn't be that stupid. I was. I had the opportunity at my emergency shift Saturday to be the anesthetist and I messed up the intubation. We fixed it quickly and the dog did great under anesthesia, until another horrible thing happened.

The abdominal exploratory looked worse than expected and the simple procedure the owner agreed to pay for would not be sufficient. The owner still refused to perform the other, more expensive but good prognosis, surgery and I had to euthanize the animal on the table. I was really shaken up by my decrease in confidence and the irresponsibility of the owner. The owner has many times allowed the 2 year old sweet poodle/lab mix to eat socks because "he always just passes them." Yet he refused to perform the appropriate surgery to heal the dog he hurt.

It was horrible and again made me question if small animal medicine is the right career for me.

As I write this I realize what a tremendous learning experience and career exploration this summer may turn out to be.

Week 2 at National Cancer Institute

2009-06-07T19:18:00.003-04:00

My second week at NIH was just as exciting as the first one.

I worked up a primate case on endometritis, spent more time with some young macaques handing them food. Note: they love marshmallows and pineapple. Some are shy, some are more outgoing but they all have fun, unique personalities.

We spent some time organizing logistics for my analgesia study. We are starting the training for the pilot study this week. Our mice come in on Tuesday and we will be behavior watching and practicing vasectomies one last time before the real thing next week. Some days will be long and hard, but hopefully it will be worth it.

I sat in on an Animal Care Use Committee Meeting and it was eye opening. I saw first hand how the legislation that many times feels like red tape when trying to organize a wet lab or experiment really does have a major impact on the welfare of the animals. It also mentioned numerous studies going on at NCI to cure brain cancer to breast cancer to HIV to ovarian cancer.

Being involved in lab animal medicine incorporates clinical duties, animal welfare, research knowledge, and the cutting edge of new medicine.

Next week I have 2 surgery days with the primates. I have to get up a little earlier than I prefer, but hopefully it will be rewarding.

VPI Summary

2009-06-06T14:25:00.006-04:00

Better late to review than never I suppose, even though I got back 2 weeks ago from California.

I really enjoyed my week in LA and benefited greatly from my week at VPI. The people were amazing and nice. My understanding of pet insurance will really add to my career if I choose the small animal career path.

While I spent 6 years in business prior to starting vet school, I did not have much knowledge on how the insurance industry works. I also did not realize that for some reason the general public does not think of pet insurance in the same way as medical, dental or even car insurance. They do not understand you have to pay for various levels of risks and benefits as you would for car insurance for pet insurance as well. They also do not understand why their pet may not be insurable or why they may still have to pay some amount.

VPI showed me that pet insurance can bridge that gap between medical advancement, higher costs, and an owner’s love for a family member if we understand how an insurance company operates. As veterinarians we must understand and educate clients on pet insurance if we want to continue to offer the best medical treatment options possible.

Learning how an insurance company works is vital in client education if veterinarians are able to educate their clients on pet insurance properly. I now have a detailed understanding of the education pitfalls currently coming between clients, pet insurance veterinarians and small animal medicine.I can use this knowledge to educate my classmates, practitioners I meet and my clients in 2 years to bridge the lack of understanding of how pet insurance works and why it costs and covers what it does.

First Week as a Lab Animal Veterinary Intern

2009-05-29T20:33:00.003-04:00

My first week at NIH National Cancer Institute as a SCRTA (which=intern, but they love acronyms there) was pretty spectacular despite getting up around 6:15 every morning.

All of the veterinarians I am working with are patient, knowledgeable, and nice. It is a very welcoming learning environment. Instead of feeling like I am in their way, they have made me feel very comfortable and excited to learn. I completed my medical evaluation and training by the end of Wednesday and performed my first sugeries ever on lab mice. I began practicing a vasectomy technique I will be using for my summer reasearch project on analgesia/anesthesia and post-op pain management. I am very excited about this project and the surgerical experience I will be getting.

Today I shadowed a lab vet's rounds with mice, frogs, and rabbits and helped perform health checks on the mice. I also got to practice an intrafemoral bone marrow injection technique that is growing in popularity with stem cell research.

I ended the week on a high note meeting with the primate veterinarian on her goals for the summer. I will be doing some research for the staff on different topics, devise new enrichm,ent ideas, play with some of the more "bored" primates, perform intubation, shadow surgery, blood collection and physical exams, and work up some cases.

It is looking like a busy, but very meaningful and educational summer!

Back from the Missing

2009-05-19T20:11:00.002-04:00

So I may have left some awesome readers hanging and I apologize. When I last wrote I was about to take my last exam of second year. Now I am officially a 3rd year! Also, have officially been in California for 5 days and loving it.

Matt and I toured all over Beverly Hills, Malibu, Venice, Santa Monica, Hollywood, UCLA, Bel Air, Getty Center, Orange County, Chinatown, Dodger Stadium and Downtown LA. It has been fun and sunny. We bought some art at the BH art market, shopped Rodeo Drive, and drove around a lot. Thank goodness for GPS and hybrid cars.

Yesterday I turned 30 (ugh) and started my 1 week veterinary externship at Veterinary Pet Insurance. The days are flying by with a lot of terrific information to absorb. I wish more vet students could have the opportunity to understand the insurance industry and how it will impact the profession.

Almost there

2009-05-11T17:41:00.003-04:00

I can taste the end of second year and it feels great. One more exam on Wednesday, with all the big ones behind me. Summer is going to be very busy, starting with a vacation/externship in sunny LA!

Seeing the 3rd years transition into their new clinician student jackets today (their first day of 4th year) made me realize just how close and possible this vet school thing can really be. It's funny whenever you feel beat down or frustrated it picks you back up somehow. It's as if vet school karma knows when you're at the breaking point.

Good luck to all with exams left! Stay tuned for a fun summer blog about Veterinary Pet Insurance, lab animal medicine at the National Cancer Institute at NIH, RAVS in Spokane, and weekly emergency cinics! Oh and hopefully some fun in between.

It seems impossible all over again

2009-05-02T18:43:00.003-04:00

After an intense 7 hours of toxicology almost straight in the library, I thought I was making head way. I decided to head to the gym for a mental break. While on the elliptical I wanted my break to continue, but I diligently opened my folder of study sheets. I remembered almost nothing that I studied all day. Panic started to set in. I kept telling myself, I needed the break and being at the gym was a good idea, but I felt guilty and helpless, so I closed the folder and continued the break.

I remind myself that I have felt this way many times before. I have been proactive about studying this material. I am doing the best I can, and hopefully it will work out. By "work out" I mean I do not have to study for these horrible exams again next year. Fingers crossed. Time to eat dinner and hit the lab.

Oh how finals are horrible! 11.5 more days of torture remain.

A beautiful weekend

2009-04-26T21:45:00.002-04:00

With no exam for 1 full week and beautiful warm, sunny weather finally, I took Friday afternoon off to play/run outside and Saturday involved little school work as well. It did involve sunshine, the VT spring football game, and playing in Target. For one of the first times during a semester I did not feel guilty about not studying. A sign that I must have needed the mental break.

Now it is Sunday evening and I am feeling the final exam preemptive stress kick in. I am trying to think of this as good stress, stress to propel me through the next 2.5 weeks, and not focus on it as panic attack time. I can only do the best I can from now until exams and I plan to be super productive from here on out, with some minor intermittent packing/cleaning. If the packing/cleaning cannot get done until after my last exam that's okay too.

So here's hoping I make it to 3rd year the first time around. 6 exams/classes to go!

2 Classes Down and Finals Begin

2009-04-24T21:08:00.002-04:00

Well respiratory medicine and musculoskeletal, two of the 3 credit classes are done. Next exam is anesthesiology on Friday, so we have some time to study, prepare, and finish up strong, I hope. Today was fun, but the last 24 hours were an emotional roller coaster.

It began yesterday at 2pm. I was in the library, focused and studying for my musculoskeletal final and then I got the email from Matt, "I can't telecommute Monday." I was heart broken since I hadn't seen him in 2 weeks and was looking forward to the extra time together. After that my focus was hazy and I was sad. Then in our last clin path lab, my teacher started crying telling us she'd miss us, and I started crying.

I fought through the disappointment and kept on studying. On this morning's exam, despite having studied for over a week for the exam, I still didn't know what was going on and had to guess on a number of questions. I hope that's not an omen for finals. The past few tests I have been studying and studying and then I am clueless on the exam.

After the test the day got brighter. My last class ended an hour early, I had a great meeting with my toxicology professor and met a friend for a picnic lunch in a tree by the Duck Pond on this beautiful day. We made our "next 30 Year's" list of things we hope to accomplish and played with her super fun dog, Diego.

Right as we were finishing my running buddy called to go for a run, perfect timing. We had a great run with her 2 dogs, then got back and did some online shopping, always fun. Then Matt met me at home and now here I am.

Less the 1 month until second year is complete

2009-04-19T21:17:00.002-04:00

People keep telling us we're on the home stretch, downhill slide. I feel like the next few weeks are an uphill battle through 1 more week of class and many final exams. The memory of last semester's final exams looms in my head like an ugly cloud. While I hope that these exams will go by quickly and I will be prepared, I cannot help but think that getting to May 13 could take forever.

On the bright side, my wildlife medicine class had a fantastic lab Saturday at the Wildlife Center of VA in Waynesboro. We practiced restraint, BCS and PE on different birds, toured the amazing facility, looked at bird/raptor radiographs, and practiced common bird bandaging techniques. I plan to go back for an externship 4th year and to shadow the vets for a day this summer.

So far second year has been more practical and I am starting to put things together and think like a doctor, but remembering all the differentials for each clinical sign for each of the species is still rusty. With each new concept that sticks in my brain, something definitely falls out.

For now we must keep trudging along and fight for our last summer break.

It's been a long time

2009-04-03T17:24:00.002-04:00

Since my last entry spring break came and went in a flash. It was a combo of yard work, clinical pathology, a SAVMA road trip to Ohio State and extracting my first tooth (harder work than you think), and a little more sleep than I am used to, but not too much.

The week back has been rough, 2 tough exams and our second go at being anesthetists, which is an exam in and of itself. I made it alive and tired. Not sure how the exams went, but that's the beauty of vet school there are always more exams...

I also pulled a back muscle Wednesday, which hurts terribly for those of you that have been blessed with never pulling muscle. I had never pulled one before and the shooting pain drove me into the arms of the doctor, NSAIDs and Vicadin. It feels much better now.

Most of my classmates are pretty tired and ready for the rat race to end for summer. I will just be patient and take it day by day. One month and change is not far away.

1 more test until Spring Break

2009-03-18T21:22:00.002-04:00

Even though spring break will not be much of a vacation for me, I am excited for a change of pace. We are all starting to get tired of studying. I am looking forward to a little time to spend outside and catching up on some much needed sleep. I truly wish we did not have 2 exams the week we return, but such is life. And upon return there will only be 4 weeks of class until finals, yeah!!

Due to the SAVMA symposium, which I am excited to go to, I will only have a few days to spend at home in Washington DC. They will be filled with doctor's appointments, yard work, a trip to the DMV for a new license, and planning out the summer, and studying. Hopefully, I'll get to see a few friends and family too and go for a bike ride.

Well, study break is over and it's time to get back to how to conduct a thorough Orthopedic horse exam.

The Semester is Flying!

2009-03-13T21:31:00.002-04:00

With 1 week and 3 exams until spring break, I can taste it! Spring also arrived, and then left.

Anyway, it's the Friday after a 3 exam week and I survived. While I do not have confirmation, I believe I passed. Next week is another 3 exam week, starting out rough with Virology on Monday. Monday exams make for excellent weekends!

On a slightly different note, my summer is shaping up to be very busy. Perhaps too busy. My summer job decisions came down to 3 amazing choices: Pathology externship at John's Hopkins University, Research at the NIH National Cancer Institute in lab animal medicine, and a very lucrative lab animal internship at Merck in NJ. After deliberation, due to location and connections I have chosen to work at NIH this summer. The 4th year externship door is open at JHU, and hopefully I can keep the door open at Merck as well. In addition, I have the RAVS trip to Washington State, possibly working a weekend shift at The HOPE Center Emergency clinic, and I was recently awarded the Veterinary Pet Insurance Externship/vacation to Orange County, CA. If somehow I manage to do all of these things, it will be quite the resume and experience-building summer.

I am a little overwhelmed, but hopefully over spring break I can start planning out how all of these jobs will come together. I also have to (boo) study for 2 exams when I get back and attend the SAVMA symposium at Ohio State.

I will be one happy and tired vet student next Friday. But as a good friend always told me...next Friday never comes, and with a summer like this he is most likely correct!

The tough get going

2009-03-01T16:21:00.003-05:00

It's been a little while, in fact it's now March, and I apologize. Clearly, the lack of blog entries is symbolic of the increasing amount of exams as the semester progresses. So far so good, but so much further to go..in fact 3 weeks until spring break. 3 very intense weeks of 2-3 exams each week. And spring break, what spring break? We return to 2 exams the first week back! I am going to the SAVMA symposium at Ohio State, though, for a memorable experience.

This weekend the snow ruined my fun and sent my husband leaving a day early for fear he may not return to work for days otherwise. It was the first time in a while the distance has really hurt me. I am trying to work through it as best I can, to study for the looming toxicology and general medicine exams. It is snowing like a beast out there. I am very sick of winter and now have another reason to hate snow!

Thankfully, we had a good, albeit short, weekend. Friday night I made dinner (after deciding not to go to the VA VMA conference in Roanoke and forfeiting the well-worth it $25) and we watched an excellent episode of Lost. Saturday we both did work together, Matt went to the VT v. Duke basketball game, and then we saw a terrific play, The Thistle at Pope Creek.

While I tried to get a lot of work done, as usual somewhere I fell short and now it will be cram, cram, cram until spring break (which will be catch up, catch up, catch up).

Okay on with the herbicide toxicoses!

Valentine's Day

2009-02-15T08:18:00.002-05:00

After a semi-productive morning of studying, I decided to rejoin the human race and have a date with my valentine. We went to the Taubman Museum of Art in Roanoke, visited some art galleries and a fabulously expensive chocolate and paper store. We ended with a huge and delicious Mexican meal at Alejandro's. It was nothing fancy, just great food and a great salsa bar, and most importantly great fun!

While I had to re-enter the vet school race when we got home, it was what I needed: to spend some time with the person I am so lucky to have.

Quotes to get you get through the day

2009-02-15T08:14:00.002-05:00

This week was a little rough on the confidence, but with supportive friends and some inspirational quotes when they were needed the most, I think I will make it through.

"Life does not put in front of you anything you can't handle."

"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."

"When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on."

Avoid the burnout

2009-02-08T20:41:00.003-05:00

Well I think I survived the first week of exams. This week contains another 2, potentially harder exams. It's Sunday and I am tired. The weather was spring-like and I tried to enjoy it a little bit. We went for a long trail run on Saturday in the late afternoon, and got a little lost due to poor trail heads and a cloudy memory. We found our way back, thankfully, before dark and were able to laugh about it. Needless to say our bodies were sore. We ran/hiked for over 40 minutes more than planned.

The rest of Saturday and Sunday were heavy study days in an effort to stay on top of the current classes and prepare for next week's exams.

This week we have a lot of lectures and a pet peeve of mine. It makes vet school infinitely less manageable when we have 6 lectures before the fist exam that will be on the second exam, when we are still trying to master the 10 prior lectures for an exam that week. It means a lot of catch up next weekend in cardiology. Ugh my brain hurts just thinking about it.

Let the Exams Begin!

2009-02-02T23:02:00.001-05:00

It is the 3rd week of classes and the games begin Wednesday. Many of the weeks of this semester are 2-3 exam weeks. As I have been talking to many other classmates and 3rd years, apparently the pre-exam anxiety I have starting this week is normal, and unfortunately does not go away with further advancement through the program. Each semester is so different, and we all find ourselves having to prove to ourselves time and again that yes we can do this.

So here is hoping that this week goes well, and makes me remember that yes I can do this.

Musculoskeletal exam Wednesday, Wildlife Medicine Midterm Friday. Until the weekend...

Could this be the hardest semester of them all?

2009-01-28T12:35:00.002-05:00

After 3 semesters under my belt, I was feeling a little more confident that I knew how to study and that I could get through it. Right about this time in the semester, I start to look ahead at all of the exams I will have to take and pass, and I get overwhelmed. It may be irrational, but this time feels different. Clinical pathology is a 3 credit, but really 5 credit class with daily homework assignments. While it is my favorite class so far, it will get ugly once the exams start coming in bunches next week. We have an average of 2 per week the entire semester, with some lovely 3 exam weeks sandwiched in there. More exams means that they count less, but I don't see how it will be possible to continue staying on top of all these subjects, that they keep warning us not to fall behind. It does appear that falling behind is a horrible idea this semester, since all the material builds on itself. In addition, more than ever it's about applying ideas to cases versus memorization/regurgitation. While I hate memorizing, it is more of a safe place right now.

Anyway, in the life of a vet student intimidation is common. We all must work past the intimidation. So far I have done all I can and it's been more than adequate, so I must believe that it will be enough again this time through.

The longing for spring break has already begun!

School's Back, Am I?

2009-01-22T21:53:00.003-05:00

I still want to be a veterinarian, I have absolutely no doubt. However, I cannot put my finger on why my motivation and typical new semester excitement has been lacking this week. The subjects are very interesting and many are more applied and clinically relevant than ever before. The thought of all the work that is required makes me tired just from thinking about it. Instead of viewing the semester as fresh and new, I keep thinking, "wow I will have a lot of outlines and review sheets to make." It could be related to me not being rested, or could it be the first sign of major burn out from the prior 3 semesters. I am not sure what the cause is, and while I have moments when I cannot wait to look some fact or concept up, for the most part my work the past few evenings has been just going through the motions.

Perhaps it's a form of "veterinary block", similar to writers block. It does not indicate you don't want to be an author/vet, but you have just hit a point where your inspiration and juices are not flowing properly. Everything feels very routine to me, and while many things in my life are positive, my veterinary inspiration is lacking. I am probably just fatigued, but I will continue to plow through and hope the motivational juices flow once more.

Winter Break Update

2009-01-14T14:39:00.002-05:00

So here I am packing up my Northern VA life and bringing it back to Blacksburg for semester 4 of vet school. The rumor is that this is the hardest semester and the one where all the learning starts to make sense. It's also the semester of expensive textbooks. While I am more rested than I was last week, I could use another week or a few days to really stay relaxed. Instead I am going to the National VBMA conference in Orlando, as a 2009 Mid-Atlantic Regional Leader. Exciting, yes! However, I am not ready to leave Matt and home yet, not that I have much of a choice now. I am also missing the big inaugural concert on Sunday, with the Boss, Beyonce, John Legend and other musicians I enjoy. Oh well, it's also going to be acrtic cold here and super crowded, and I have to hope it will be warmer in Florida.

I am starting to be complacent with how break went. I did what I needed to do, and no one ever gets everything done that they want to. I worked a lot, applied for as many summer jobs as I could find, and relaxed and worked out as much as possible. Now it is time to regroup and re-energize and hope the semester goes quickly, successfully and that sometime in March I will have a summer job.

Until then I must finish packing and be one with the fact that no matter how much time you have off, you will always want more. Life goes on with or without you.

I think I am saddest that today was my last day to sleep in.

All good things...

2009-01-12T13:47:00.002-05:00

I have to say I do not feel very rejuvenated and rested. In fact last night my mind wandered everywhere, except to sleep. I really do not want to go back to school. I don't exactly know why, since I am as sure as ever that I want to be a veterinarian. Here are soem possible reasons:

Matt's telecommuting situation is still TBD
Still exhausted from last semester
I know what I am in for
We lost 5 classmates to semester 1 of second year
I have not figured out my summer, which means it will have to get done during the semester.
I didn't get enough time with Matt and friends.
I have a new role as VBMA Mid-Atlantic regional leader, and not sure how that will fit in.
Ready for summer.
Don't want the busy, stressful life back.
Tired.

So while I have dented the to-do list (yes I unlocked all mariokart races and some new characters), I am not ready to go back into the bubble of vet school. I hope this crappy feeling is replaced by renewed sense of energy very soon!!

Ice Skating-Like Riding a Bike

2009-01-05T22:20:00.003-05:00

So I have been chipping away at my last days of break list. Today I submitted summer job applications (still more to do tomorrow), mopped all the floors, and took 2 gym classes back to back. Yesterday Matt and I went ice skating for the first time in at least 15 years. Not a bad start to my second to last full week of break.

Ice skating was a blast! After one lap hugging the wall, I broke free. Many of the skills I acquired when I took lessons as a kid came flooding back. I almost skated backwards, could do lunges, in-out circles (not sure what these are actually called), and most importantly could control my speed. My ankles and shins hurt today, but it was worth it.

After ice skating, Matt and I walked by a murder site by the Verizon Center in DC before going to eat a well-deserved lunch at Matchbox. We had a really nice lunch, great wood-fired pizza!

This week is off to better start, but the DVD player is on the fritz. Last year the plasma tv broke when I was ready to watch some tv and this year the DVD player, just as I am ready to start on my Alfred Hitchcock box set I got for Christmas 2 years ago. Oh well, thank heavens for the Playstation 2 we never used.

2008 Recap

2009-01-01T20:14:00.003-05:00

Somehow I slugged through finals and had a somewhat successful semester. There is some controversy concerning 10% of my class and the school's adjusted "D" grade policy. The administration had informed us that we were grandfathered under the old policy for 3 D's =failing, but apparently they are arguing that 2 D's = failing and 8 classmates may not be returning for the spring semester. I hope this is not the case. The class president sent out a survey to gauge general understanding of the policy, but due to the holidays we have not heard anything further regarding the administrations decision.

The whole issue has caused some backlash between the students and the school's administration, which I think is a shame because I think all of our teachers and staff work very hard and have taught us well. They did not, however, address the policy change to us properly. I hope the situation is rectified properly.

On another note I'd like to recap 2008 accomplishments:

3 semesters of vet school under my belt.
Tried my hand at biomedical research, and enjoyed a lovely summer in Blacksburg.
Co-published my first review journal article (volume to be determined in early 2009) on toll-like receptors.
Continued networking throughout the veterinary community and exploring alternative career options, such as lab animal medicine.
Had a blast in the UK with old friends.
Received a national VBMA position as the Mid-Atlantic Regional Leader for 2009.

To quickly recap winter break thus far:

I was not "into" the holidays this year. I suppose between the crappy economy and lack of funds energy and time it just wasn't my year.
Garfield, one of my cats with FLUTD, blocked the weekend after my last exam, while we were in NYC for a party and to visit my mom.
I have still not caught up on sleep between working many shifts at the Hope Center and lack of sleep in NY.
I visited Covance with the Pathology club and learned more opportunities in lab animal medicine.
I have been cleaning the house, and trying to get back into shape.
Matt and I cooked a delicious Rick Bayless Mexican meal for New Year's Eve.

I am already starting to get depressed about break being half over:(

Still on the list:

Finish cleaning the house.
Get more into shape.
Apply for summer programs.
See more friends and go ice skating at the National Gallery.
Try to organize more photos.
Watch more movies and unlock the 3 other races in Mariokart.
Attend the National VBMA meeting at NAVC in Orlando.

While spring semester will be very interesting and start bringing concepts together, I believe it will be very challenging and I am still tired. I can only hope the next few weeks can rejuvenate me enough to get through to May 14.

So close yet so far

2008-12-03T22:34:00.002-05:00

I feel as if this has been a previous blog title, but pish posh. 2 more days of class remain and 6 final exams stand between me and my tv! The semester has flown by, yet somehow I think these next 2 weeks could be laboriously slow and painful. I am slogging through to get to the end of half a year! I know it will feel amazing when its over, assuming I can advance onto next semester.

Overall life is fine. My brain and body are tired, but all my classmates feel the same way, and as I have mentioned before, there is solace in solidarity.

Some good news is that I was accepted into a RAVS trip this summer and will be going to Washington State to perform surgery in rural America. That is a slight exaggeration, but it should be an amazing experience. For more info check out http://www.ruralareavet.org/

I am also investigating sumer lab animal programs at NIH and Cornell. I also got a regional leader position in the national VBMA. So, exciting things are in the works. I just have to make it less than 2 weeks and then I can rejuvenate and relax. Until then, it's time to study hard and finish strong (or just squeak by), while mantaining some sort of balance. No more 10.5 hour-straight library days for me this time. I am incorporating gym time at a minimum and possibly packing time for study breaks.

Wish me luck and good luck to all other vet students out there. Hang in there and it will be over soon. You may even be more knowledgeable in the end.

So much to do and laziness ensues

2008-11-24T12:59:00.002-05:00

It is officially Thanksgiving break. The spa was lovely and the weekend was oh so lazy. Today is Monday and I am trying t kick it off with some productive work, but I really do not want to study. I would rather sleep. I have been able to sleep like a teenager again, for 10+ hours. It took everything I had to get up around 8:15 this morning and get cracking on some pharmacology index cards. And the whole time I thought, "I'd rather be in the bed."

Not sure how to get my motivation back, but the less I get done over break the worse finals will be. There are so many other tasks I'd rather do, such as holiday cards and looking for lab animal medicine externships. While those tasks can all wait until winter break, I mus find my mojo and gte back to the 2.5 week task at hand.

At least I still have a week to get cracking!

No news is good news

2008-11-18T12:38:00.002-05:00

Last I wrote it was just November and now I encroach the long-awaited Thanksgiving break. I am excited to kick it off with a spa certificate and some friends in DC, but I will have to study during break if I want to hold strong and make it through finals.

It's hard to believe there is only 1.5 weeks of class left and soon fall semester second year could be behind me! As much as I wanted Thanksgiving, I now long for December 17 much more.

I have been MIA not due to exams, but due to some nagging virus that landed in my throat and has only after a week decided to maybe move onto other pastures. I hate being sick. I have not been to the gym in a week, my back hurts, and I feel like a fat slob. I am feeling well enough to go to yoga tonight and hopefully get back in the swing of the gym soon.

Happy Thanksgiving to all! Halloween pictures to be posted soon.

It is finally November!

2008-11-02T21:07:00.002-05:00

October has finally ended, and as second year vet student this is quite the milestone. No exams this week, just an itty bitty quiz and a 10 point bacteriology lab unknown. The worst is over until finals. It's time to catch up on classes and sleep.

I believe I made it through October okay, still awaiting one grade, which may be the low-point because I was too tired to study for small animal nutrition midterm. The anxiety over the clinical techniques exam kept me from sleeping much the night before, despite my love affair with melatonin. I fell asleep in the library twice and could not stay up late or wake up early to study. I could not absorb anything and was just worn down.

Anyway clinical techniques went well, albeit nerve-wracking for no reason.

Halloween was a blast. I realized how little fun I had had this semester, when I actually had fun dancing and partying, especially as Wonder Woman.

One more big exam before Thanksgiving break; I need to redeem myself on small animal nutrition next Friday.

With the election Tuesday and football game Thursday, it is a welcome relief to enter November in a less stressful mindset.